Eyes And Lies
by Mary Seph
Summary: "Teikoku will always win." This was an absolute truth and a huge lie. To that man, we were nothing but disposable tools to achieve victory. Do you believe me? Because spies are the ultimate liars. [FIRST SEVEN CHAPTERS UNDER EDITING]
1. Of Iron and Blood

**Prologue | Of Iron and Blood**

"Fa. . . ther. . ." I mumbled as his body fell in front of the bed at the sharp sound of a bang. Swiftly, my mother tightened her hand over my mouth, ordering me to stay silent. Her warmth was the only thing that told me what was happening in front of my eyes was real. Yet, I couldn't understand the situation.

The tips of my fingers and toes shook and tightened, my body wrapped in my mother's embrace while laying on the floor. With the curtain half-opened, a streetlight curiously peered in, revealing vague human silhouettes in heavy clothing.

My heart almost seemed to leap out of my throat as my mother's warmth left me in the dark room. I lifted my chin to witness my mother with her own gun, much like the one my father had taken out from the vintage console radio near the door. The one she joked was too old to have in the house anymore.

My parents became total strangers. More than the hardened expressions I had never seen; not the ones they put up during a conference in front of the company's associates. It was the display of illegal possession of firearms punished with at least a year in prison.

A flash of light illuminated the room, the man who had shot my Father falling down. But as the sound receded, like a crescendo, it was her who fell.

I drew my legs closer, cowering back as the two remaining men destroyed the sanctity of my parent's bedroom. I looked down at my mother and screeched as I saw a hole in her head and a void for eyes.

"No. . . No. . ." My voice shook, squeaking as the lights went back on.

My sanity snapped at the unfathomable scene, the piercing smell of iron, the sound of heavy boots, and the smell of sweat. And the realization that my life was nothing more than a candle that can be easily sniffed out.

I flinched at the sound of metal against metal, lifting my eyes to meet the void that swallowed my mother's life.

If I had a drop of composture left, it evaporated under the heat of certain death.

I let out a scream, tears pouring out of my violet eyes as if I was a baby who had barely gotten out of my mother's womb.

 **Published: January 1st, 2017**

 **Rewritten: January 15th, 2019**


	2. Deep Deep Forest

**Chapter 1 | Deep Deep Forest**

I let out a loud gasp as I pushed myself up, covering my mouth with my hand. In a hurry, I swiped my eyes around the room. My raged breath was the loudest sound in the school infirmary, empty as the nurse in duty seemed to have gone somewhere.

As seconds passed, I began to collect myself and my memories. I wiped the sweat off my chest with my clothes, inhaling deeply for another time to calm down my breathing.

Digging one of my canines against the inside corner of my lip, I pressed a hand against my forehead. "I can't lie to Coach Nikaidou after this," I glowered, "it's the third time." I brought my knees closer before placing my arms on it, then my head, and sighed loudly. "It's not good."

I jumped as I heard two pairs of footsteps approach from the far side of the room. The office was at the end of the first floor, pushed aside by first-year classrooms. Having checked the time earlier, I begged for it to not be anyone from the soccer club as I stared at the closed door frozen stiff.

I resigned myself as I identified the rhythm of the owners of the footsteps', getting closer and closer. Taking another deep breath, I lowered my legs and straightened my back.

The door opened, a man and a boy staring in with a clear difference in worry.

I waved with a smile, painfully aware of the awkward air they brought. "Hello."

The boy returned a short smile and a nod. I turned my sight to the biggest challenge, an annoyed coach.

"How are you feeling, Sumire-san?" he asked with apparent worry.

"Oh, I'm fine. I apologize for worrying everyone," I replied casually like before. Turning my body towards their approaching figures, I tucked my legs in and sat properly.

This time, neither of them grabbed the chair beside the bed. I gripped an end of my skirt. While Coach Nikaidou's height was intimidating, I kept my smile strong.

"Sumire-san," he started, patience nearing its end, "this is the third time in four months."

"I know," I interjected, "the anemia hasn't made me feel very well."

His features tensed. "You didn't write that in your club form."

I giggled lightly. "You would have judged me as a frail little girl. I can't have that."

A second passed, the silence moistening the air. "How are you adjusting to the school? You are the only student from Kanto," the Coach said.

I waved a hand dismissively. "It's the anemia, Coach Nikaidou. I mean it." I looked at the silent boy beside him, the armband bestowing him the title of Captain despite being a first year was washed in the orange hue of the sunset. "I want to help the soccer club as much as I can." The only thought in my mind was that I couldn't go out that easily.

Gouenji Shuuya-kun met my gaze and turned to the Coach; I mimicked. "Coach," he called.

Coach Nikaidou glanced between us for a moment and sighed. "I need the document of a physician certifying you can carry out your duties as a manager. I can't have you fainting in the qualifying match."

I nodded firmly. "I will have it as soon as possible."

️️ (^・ω・^ ) ️

After bidding goodbye to the team, I left through the front gate while ignoring the fixed stare from Coach Nikaidou. The Mukata triplets also had something to say about fainting, their mockery going unanswered but with a glare. If there was a reason the soccer team wasn't improving, it was because of their arrogance.

The black car that brought me home was parked in the same place. I opened my bag as soon as the engine rumbled and the car pulled away from the school. Taking a regular notebook and a mechanical pencil, I opened the latter to this week's notes.

I cocked my head to the side and lifted my brows. Placing the end of the pencil on my chin, I hummed unsurely. "It doesn't look right." I tapped my chin. "But I can't ask Yuuto. This isn't a test question."

I scribbled intently on the notebook, editing and fixing the information of Kidokawa Seishuu's soccer club team. After blowing the eraser scraps, I brushed the page clean. "Is this acceptable?" I frowned and sighed in defeat. "I am holding my end of the deal one way or the other."

Minutes later, I was tempted to look away as Teikoku Gakuen's imposing presence grew from the distance. The metallic structures reflected the receding light, giving the school a larger than life appearance as a middle school.

I instinctively held my breath.

As soon as I stepped out of the car, I found the recently goggle-eyed boy who was to escort me to that man's office.

His poker face and indifferent body language left little signs he was willing to participate in small talk, yet I gave him a friendly greeting. "Thank you for waiting after club every week. Let's finish this fast and go home."

He nodded quietly and turned to the looming school. My smile fell and I stared at his growing back with worry.

You wouldn't believe we were childhood friends and former classmates.

Whenever my thoughts dipped into blaming my weaknesses, I shook my head and blamed the source of his change. Kageyama Reiji. Nevertheless, I curled my hands tightly. "If only I were smart enough to be here," I swore and trotted to catch up with him.

I made some small talk to keep my mind away from the eerie surroundings, a pressure that would otherwise crush my bones, until we reached that man's office . I had been here plenty of times, even before having to choose a middle school, but there was always something strange about the shadows at every corner.

As we stopped in front of that man's office, I put a hand over my neck when a chill shook my spine, feeling a pair of eyes on me. I quickly looked around.

"There isn't supposed to be anyone here now, right?" I asked Kidou in a hurry.

"No, there isn't," he replied without turning his back.

I looked back once again, sensing the stare under a fraction of a second. Gazing at a particular corner, my lips fell as Yuuto called using my last name after the door opened.

We presented ourselves to the Supreme Commander of Teikoku Gakuen's soccer club with a forty-year winning history, Kageyama Reiji. Wearing a purple outfit and dark lenses as sinister as his soul, he sat on a throne obtained through dirty deals and an undeniable talent for business and soccer tactics. He was the man who made Yuuto the soccer player he is. And the man who will influence him the most from now on.

Spite contorted my facial features. I despised the respect I held for him as a businessman, for he managed to snatch the child in Yuuto I was tasked to protect and nurture when Kidou-san adopted him.

As per the established routine, I gave Yuuto the notebook who passed it to that man.

"Was is this?" he said dryly after reading the notebook, his deep voice sending me into a state of rising panic. My fingers trembled. "Is this the best you can do?"

I bit my lip tightly. "I am learning ways to-"

"Leave." He closed the notebook, pushing it lightly as if rejecting a piece of garbage.

I took a step forward. "Their improvement is slow. Even with the match in two weeks, I do not believe they can win as a team. Gouenji-kun is the best player they have both in terms of speed, power, and technique. I can do this properly!" I yelled desperately. "I can give reports!"

Unfazed, he clasped his fingers. "Notes are crucial to a team's development. If you can't do that then your reports are as valuable as a witness's testimony. I want facts and numbers. Now leave."

Stress built up on my body and I tightened to hold it back. Digging my nails on my palms, I was aware the words I wanted to say were unwelcomed and broke apart before they left my mouth.

Yuuto presented the notebook back as if mocking me. I snatched it from his hand and turned away, walking briskly towards the door.

"Swim back to the surface, or die. Those are your choices, Sumire. You still are the heir of the Sumire Foundation. Want it or not."

I stopped at the threshold, gazing into the shadows of the dark forest: a world where I was lost, without a purpose to live. Yuuto and I were like Hansel and Gretel, two children who were tempted by the sight of a house of candy and a witch who offered to satisfy our cravings and dreams. But the witch didn't need to trap us because we came back of our own free will. And how fitting it felt to watch the animated Disney's short with Danse Macabre, a depressing and wistful song to top the tale off.

Yuuto stopped behind me, quietly observing my reaction like a child to his mother.

"I know," I blankly replied to that man, stepping forward, back into the real nightmare called life. "I know, but what can I do in this state?"

 **Deep Deep Forest | End**

Hello! Thank you for reading. For those who read this chapter as a rewrite, please tell me your thoughts. And for the new readers, nice to meet you, please call me Mary, and also tell me your thoughts! :D

Don't worry, this isn't an CharaxOC story. Yuu isn't interested in boys ;D. She is conveniently inserted as Kidou's childhood friend as the one who was to show him how the high society works as a fellow child. Also, the Sumire Foundation is fictional but it is also a financial group like the Kidou Financial Group. That is the reason they met.

 **Published: January 30th, 2017**

 **Rewritten: January 17th, 2019**


	3. Rocky Road Ahead

**Chapter 2 | Rocky Road Ahead**

"Those who got red marks, come see me during the break," Sakaki-sensei, the Math teacher, said as the bell rang.

I leaned my chin on my curled fist, sighing as I lazily observed the middle-aged teacher leave the classroom.

My eyes inevitably fell to the score scribbled on the paper. I let out an indifferent sigh. Flickering the quiz over, I leaned my head to the window.

I was thankful my seat was in the top far corner of the classroom away from the noise. I felt my consciousness fade away and my body relax until the next teacher slammed the front door open.

I let out a small squeak and shook my head, getting ready for the next class.

Morning classes eventually ended and the bell that signaled lunch time rang. Folding the test and sliding it inside a pocket on my skirt before standing up, I intended to go to the faculty office.

"Sumire-san!" A familiar voice called from the back. "Let's each lunch." Mitsumiya, a girl I became acquainted with, stood beside the desk we eat lunch beside her childhood friend, Odayaka Chiyo-chan who smiled cheerfully. An aspiring cook and a sportswoman were the least likely friends I thought I would associate with.

I nodded at Mitsumiya and waved demurely. "I'm going to the restroom. I will be back," I said, my voice quieter than usual, walking out after hearing her demotivated reply.

"Geez," Sakaki-sensei complained as he stared at the quiz I handed back, leaning on the back of the poor squeaking chair. A pencil eraser quietly tapped the desk like a metronome setting the beat. "What did you learn in grade school to get grades like this? I heard your grades weren't this bad."

My expression fell further, his words distant but hurtful. I commanded myself to wake up and reply but I desired the relaxing comfort of my bed, yet, I was fearful I wouldn't be able to close my eyes for long.

"Were you confident or something?" he teased with a grin, frowning the next moment. The pencil stopped. "Are you listening, Sumire-san?"

My shoulders jumped. "Um, yes!" I scrunched my eyes shut for a moment and opened them, the world regaining focus every so slightly. I spoke with mock cheer, "To be honest, I have considered attending a cram school. Although there aren't many near my neighborhood." I blinked repeatedly with a lazy tight smile to prove I was awake.

"That is good." He placed a thick elbow on the chair. The pencil resumed the beat, albeit slower. "At least it seems you care." 'Who does he think he is?' I thought, holding my reply. "I heard your parents owned some businesses," he continued teasing, "Shouldn't this come easy? They are just numbers after all."

I huffed lightly, my eyelids halfway succumbing to its weight. "Sensei," I unintentionally drawled instead of sounding serious, "I know what I should be doing to prevent this from happening again. Isn't that the point of this talk?"

He frowned, slapping the pencil on the table. "Well, you better start on it. If you fail in the upcoming test, you will do a make-up exam. No excuses this time."

"I understand," I grumbled, his reprimand piercing through my eardrums.

He took the pencil again and tapped with the sharp end. "I'll put the make up test on the day of the qualifying match if you don't show improvement. It's right around that time."

My eyes widened, the words like a slap that woke my mind. "What?! You. . . wouldn't-!"

"Just because you are the soccer club manager and the Commander's eyes doesn't mean you can do what you want," he reproached, flickering the pencil in a vertical position and incessantly tapping the tip against his desk.

"I know that!" I grew flustered, "I wouldn't be doing this if I didn't care!" I covered my mouth and glanced at the nearby surroundings, the few teachers around engrossed in their work to listen to a student's outburst. _"Isn't your job to help me?!"_ I hissed in a low voice.

Sakaki-sensei raised a confused eyebrow and flipped back the paper. "Then this is nothing more than an incentive." His eyes narrowed. "And you are a student first and foremost."

I gave him a look, took the paper from his chubby fingers, and excused myself, trotting towards the classroom with a tight frown. Soon, an idea made me blink away the growing foul mood. "This is a perfect chance," I perked up and slid the paper back into my skirt pocket before paying a quick visit to the restroom to wash my face and clear my mind before reapplying the concealers to hide the dark circles under my eyes.

Entering the classroom with confident strides, my eyes searched for a certain spiky-haired student. Locking sights with Mitsumiya and Chiyo-chan, I made a gesture with my hand before resuming the search. Soon I found the boy as he erased the chalkboard.

"Gouenji-kun," I called with a friendly smile. "Do you have a moment?"

He looked down with his usual stoic expression and lowered his arm, a silent gesture that I had his attention.

At that moment, my neck prickled in a familiar manner. I lifted my hand in front of Gouenji-kun. "Actually, can we talk outside the classroom? I believe it won't take long."

He nodded obediently and placed back the eraser, however, as we were about to leave the classroom, he threw a quiet "wait" a trotted back to his seat. As I trailed his figure, my eyes fell on the source of discomfort; a group of girls, their glares sharpening as our sights locked. Locking my fingers behind my back, I innocently took a few steps back to fall outside the classroom.

I grimaced. "If rumors start about him and I, would I be able to stop them?" I sighed. "How annoying. I never quite understood why sportsmen are so popular."

Gouenji-kun and I talked about morning practice and the team-neither of us had the intention to step over our boundaries or get personal. He didn't ask if I was able to get the doctor's certification to take part in club activities Coach Nikaidou requested-which I did-and I didn't bring the topic at all.

I wrote reports about the team members as soccer players, but I was sure that man would be interested in personal information. Luckily, I was given a believable excuse to breach our club-matters-only relationship.

I glanced at Gouenji-kun and studied his features, suspicious settling as he hadn't yet asked where I was taking him.

As we reached the third floor, the energy I had built had ebbed out. I heard a loud teasing hum. In front of us was a girl, her uniform violating at least five school rules, including skirt length.

"If it isn't the first years," she taunted, holding her weight on one leg.

I lifted my eyebrows and tilted my head, stopping for the sake of politeness. "Excuse me?" I feigned ignorance, carefully inspecting her appearance to bring up a name and any information I had of her: cherry red hair softly curled, scrunched eyes under a thin frown line, and sculpted legs like marble.

"Don't pretend," she complained, one eyelid lower than the other. "Everyone knows you two are going out. You are always together outside of class."

Taken aback, a waved a hand rapidly. "Senpai, I am sure you are misunderstanding." I recognized her as Takanashi Amami, the ace of the basketball club who was interviewed as a second year for a sports magazine; she came to the soccer field once. "It's only natural for the captain and manager to be around each other. We want to make the soccer club grow." I shot him a smile. "Right, Gouenji-kun?"

His clueless expression only angered Senpai further. I snapped my head back and widened my smile. "Anyway, Senpai, can we talk about this during club time? We are busy right now. And lunch break will finish soon," I said breezily.

She crossed her arms with a 'hmph', and I took it as a sign to move on. I thanked her and stepped forward but because of an almost inaudible comment, my feet stopped before reaching the third step.

 _"A boy and a girl can't be together unless one is interested in the other."_

Before I could think, I was closing into her, staring right into her half-closed amber eyes. "If you are that lonely that you are going to spread baseless rumors, why don't you confess to Terajima-senpai and cry over a broken heart instead of grumbling to two first years who are too involved in their club to think about something as worthless as romance!"

Senpai's face went red to her ears. Giving her one last swift glare, I ascended the stairs as I fumed. Soon, I heard Gouenji-kun's footsteps behind me.

"People should stop being so petty and cowardly and start solving their problems," I hissed. But that anger resided as I realized I had finally done justice to the same comment towards Yuuto and me a year ago.

I opened my eyes, finding we had reached the last floor. I distinguished the door to the roof was at the far right in the hazy view. Detaching myself from the wall, I blinked.

I pressed a hand against my chest. Between the feeling of nostalgia and accomplishment, there was something else I couldn't pinpoint. Yet, as I noticed Gouenji-kun's figure, the thought slipped away replaced with an urgent question.

"Gouenji-kun, why do you. . . trust-" I stopped for a moment and murmured, "I believe it is trust. Why do you trust me?"

His eyes widened ever so slightly before pondering deeply. "I heard about you from a boy who transferred from Gakushuin Elementary." Giving the boy's name, it was clear he was a former member of the soccer club. That boy and I grew close when I first became the manager. He loved flowers as much as his mother and wanted to take over his family's flower shop.

My last name, Sumire, written as the flower, means small love, small bliss, or sincerity, he once explained. I couldn't voice agreement. The Sumire Foundation and my violet eyes were a symbol of pride and power, not "small", and definitely not "sincere", for the best choices require a great sacrifice.

"So!" I leaned against the wall and placed a leg over the other, smiling playfully. "I take it what he said was accurate."

"Yeah, more the most part," he replied simply.

I blinked, confused. "Was he wrong about something?"

He looked down with a stoic expression. "I didn't take you to go out of your way to help someone. But that depends on the circumstance." He shrugged.

I hummed thoughtfully as if I understood his words. "Anyway, we shouldn't take long." I pulled out the quiz and showed him my sorry score. My eyebrow twitched as his lips suppressed a chuckle. "Sakaki-sensei will put the make-up test on the day of the qualifying match if I fail the next test. . ." I trailed off, building the courage to ask.

"Then," Gouenji-kun said, "In exchange, I want your help with this." He pulled out a paper of his own, perhaps what he retrieved from his desk before leaving the classroom. The paper read _'Fire Tornado -Kidokawa Seishuu Soccer Club'_ with a set of instructions in clean writing.

I grabbed the lower corner of the paper and pulled it closer. "This is a hissatsu, right?" I asked suspiciously.

He nodded.

I suppressed a grin and a scream, hanging a small smile. "Alright. I'll help you."

️️ (^・ω・^ ) ️

In the passing days, Gouenji-kun and I devised his new training with Coach Nikaidou's help; he wasn't in the school when it was first created, so we heavily depended on the instructions. Firstly, Gouenji-kun learned how to do an overhead. Until then, we reviewed the material that would be on the test at the local library after school where I learned about his family: his father was a doctor working at a local hospital, and he had a little sister. However, sadness that washed over in his eyes when I asked about his mother. I changed the topic.

Yet, despite a week to know him better, I wasn't able to cross the distance he held against the other team members and everyone else. He was a reserved boy who spoke when necessary, and while I respected his idiosyncrasy and was at awe at his intelligence, the lack of will, or perhaps ability to get close to others would someday accrue interest.

I presented my report with a proud smile.

"Sumire, Sakaki contacted me," that man said, closing the notebook in an unusually slow movement.

Breathing caught on my throat, I couldn't help but grab the side of my skirt for reassurance. The air grew cold and uncomfortable even Yuuto shifted.

"What did he say?" I stuttered, glancing down in embarrassment at my voice.

"Your reports haven't gotten any better, and your grades are falling." He leaned back on the wide chair with poise and authority. "You are failing to uphold your end. Do you have a plan to uphold your grades after the Football Frontier is over?"

"Tha-that, cram school! Yes!" I exclaimed with mock excitement, my heart beating faster.

"You believe it will aid you to stay in the advanced course?" he asked, impassive.

My voice deflated. "I. . . I won't know unless I try," I replied unsurely. I glanced at Yuuto's stoic expression, wondering why that man never brought up the terms of the deal in front of him, speaking through subtext he would hardly be able to put together.

"This isn't elementary school. And you aren't a kid anymore." That man leaned forward, placing his elbows on the desk. "You have a bigger responsibility than that. If it doesn't come as second nature, how are you planning to handle human relationships and other responsibilities?"

I stared at the floor, fingertips trembling. The person I used to be was able to handle school and relationships like no other. If I was-

"The past you was also able to handle this level of pressure," he said, voicing my thoughts.

I nodded firmly, biting my lip. "You are correct. I was able to handle this. I have a responsibility. But I can't accept it. Not right now," I admitted.

My death sentence fell as if I was Marie Antoinette under the guillotine: he pushed himself back, shifting the chair to the side. "If you fail this test, you will transfer to Mikage Sennou where you will focus on your studies. That is all."

️️ (^・ω・^ ) ️

The walk to the outside was silent. Deadly silent. My view was full of the dark metallic tiles of Teikoku's halls, and all my senses were cut from my eyes: I didn't hear, feel, taste, or smell. Nothing, just like when Higashi-san dragged me out of the house after the armed men left two corpses in the room. I was empty. A living doll.

When we reached the entrance, Yuuto turned to me with a worried frown. "Do you. . . want to eat something?"

"Ice cream."

A few still seconds later, I felt his hand slowly wrap around mine. He carefully turned around and walked, pulling me along.

I stared at his back, then at my hand. _'Let him,'_ I thought, _'it doesn't matter.'_

Eventually, we reached an ice cream parlor in the city's square. The sun was almost down and the streetlights shone like fireflies.

"We should be going home soon," I blankly muttered. Yuuto looked at me, then asked if I had chosen a flavor. A moment later, his hand flinched when a female worker asked for our order, hesitation over letting go of my hand.

After scanning the list, I chose the one that sounded best, written in English. _"Rocky Road."_

From the corner of my eye, I saw Yuuto's shoulders slump.

We sat outside with our ice creams and began to eat quietly.

Yuuto broke the silence.

"I think it's not a bad-"

"I would rather die than go to a nerd's school," I interrupted, stabbing the memory of the ice cream ball before staring at him. "No questions asked."

Yuuto lowered his head and stared at his cup, eyebrows knitting in a manner I knew very well: his vast knowledge that led to awareness, seeing that man's side, and perhaps mine. I observed intently, not taking a step forward or back.

The stores began to crowd, the chatter increasing. I pulled my legs up, took the cup from the table, and buried myself on the chair.

"What are you doing?" Yuuto asked.

"Hiding."

". . . Why?"

"I have no right to be here," I casually replied with what would anger him. Staring at his troubled figure, I hung a small smile. "I am useless now, am I not?" I asked. Efficacy was ingrained in Yuuto and I since we were little. Cut off the unnecessary and the useless to maximize profit. Everyone knew that mantra. That man in particular was known put it harshly in practice.

I had the pleasure to see Yuuto's mask crumble, showing the vulnerable boy I have known for six years. "That's not-!" He stood up in a haste, stopping at the last moment.

I nodded happily, glomping another scoop. "Good choice. Lying is not good."

"Look who is talking," he hissed between his teeth, slumping back on the chair, "smiling as if nothing is wrong."

I giggled. "That's what adults do. Anyway, all I have to do is pass that exam," I concluded, focusing on the issue instead of the stakes. The very opposite of Yuuto.

His frown deepened, the smart and composed Kidou Yuuto coming back. "I thought we were talking on the premise that you would fail."

I giggled again. "I already started studying." I winced as the muscles on my back protested because of the uncomfortable position, but didn't shift.

"Alone?" Yuuto asked.

"With someone."

"Whom?"

"Gouenji-kun of course."

The corners of my lips pulled at the astonishment in Yuuto's face and his incoherent reply. I hugged my stomach as I laughed heartedly.

"It-it's not funny!" He stuttered, blushing lightly.

"It is. Of course it is," I said between breaths. "Ouch, ouch, haha." I carefully cleaned the tears at the corners of my eyes.

We continued talking for a while. Our empty cups weren't an excuse to leave. There was so much to talk about: school, the past, the present, even the future. More than the food, it was this friendly chat that lifted my spirit.

We had done a full circle, coming back to the beginning of the conversation to address the elephant in the room. "What if you were in my place?" I asked, building a comparison for Yuuto to understand how dire I saw the situation as, "what if you failed at one thing, and soccer would be taken from you? Prohibited from playing, reading soccer magazines, and watching matches? Just boring homework and boring meetings."

He lifted an eyebrow. "You have a point. I wouldn't want to live like that."

I nodded. "Now, what if you were injured so bad you wouldn't be able to play soccer anymore?"

He frowned. "That would be a horrible scenario. What is it related to?"

"It is how I feel right now," I said casually, "Knowing there is a world I belong to but unable to go back to it."

His face fell like a sad puppy's. "Aw, Yuuto. I didn't mean to make you sad." I pushed the chair closer and stretched my arm, caressing his head between his temple and scalp. "I'll fix this."

He stayed quiet for a few seconds as if brooding. ". . . If there was a way I could get you out of this, I would do it," he said with quiet determination.

I giggled dismissively and stroke his thick dreadlocks in a comforting manner. It was a unique feeling, it's rough texture as if evidence of the tragedy that marked him.

"You aren't a prince. And I am not a princess," I said with a soft voice. "Those things are better left on fairytales and fiction."

His features twisted in a conflicted expression. "Yeah. . . you are too masculine to be a princess," he whispered.

I pulled my hand away in surprise. "What?"

His eyebrows fell. "You are competitive and aggressive. You hide your weakness and want to be the best. I realized this after your parents died. You were different after that."

I hummed in agreement before giggling bitterly. "It is not a compliment when my father still preferred you because you were a boy."

I looked around, taking in the surroundings again, and frowned at the sight of a small puppy, loud and shameless animal, unlike the graceful felines.

Lowering my eyelids as I recalled Yuuto's words, I found a crucial contradiction, a glimmer of hope. "And look where I am because of that," I said with a wry smile.

 **Rocky Road Ahead | End**

This chapter was unintentionally longer because I couldn't find how to split it anywhere in between. But the rest aren't this long, and the published chapters are less than 2k. The first scene was indeed a rewrite from the original draft, now relevant to the plot lol. Who hates exams? Raise your hand!

Because of the time period, the Gouenji in this fic will be slightly different from canon. Any feedback about him is so so so appreciated as I'm so scared to make him OOC. Perhaps he may come across as inmature and a little more talkative in the future chapters.

Will Yuu be able to pass the test and prevent being shipped to Mikage?! I partially find it funny because Yuu is level-headed and uses drama as a joke. And Sakaki-sensei doesn't get paid enough to stand that girl XD. He basically has the same role as Fuyukai with Domon's case.

 **Published: March 5th, 2017**

 **Rewritten: February 9th, 2019**


	4. I Had A Dream

**Chapter 3 | I Had A Dream**

The day of the exam and the qualifying match continued to approach. The club's lively atmosphere was swallowed with anticipation and excitement at each step Gouenji-kun took to polish Fire Tornado, now in the last stage of putting movement, timing, and power together.

As for me, transferring to Mikage was not an option. I was decided on passing that test, studying in any free time I had. I used this opportunity to ask one of my trusted maids, Higashi-san, to help me.

"To be honest, I cannot see you as a student in Mikage Sennou. They are really smart, aren't they?" she said, sitting at the head of the coffee table in my personal living room as we chatted. It was the place I did the most work in, a vast space with positive ambiance and plenty of light.

I hummed lazily in agreement. "They are. Not only it's a blow on my pride, but I know I won't be able to make it in Mikage. They are purely focused on academics." I hugged myself and shivered. "They are nerds! There is no way I can get along with them! . . . I might be bullied," I said with mock fear.

Higashi-san giggled and nodded with a cheerful _'uhn uhn'_. "Really, it's not a school you should be. You fit best in a school where you can be a social butterfly."

"Yes!" I exclaimed, tapping my fists on the table. "Exactly! It's weird!"

"And right now you look so happy," she said with a warm smile. "Happier since that day. I am glad."

My eyes widened. I glanced away and smiled demurely. "I believe I can do this, and Gouenji-kun helped me tie my strengths to memorizing and understanding the material." Algebraic formulas were like an orchestra; they had their own characteristics and harmony and had the objective to reach absolute silence or equilibrium, zero.

Two days before the qualifying match, the test was held. Eyes fixed on the paper, I didn't waste a second and moved from question to question, starting from the ones I was able to answer on the spot or noted the formulas I had to use if I recalled them.

An hour later, my head was hot and I tasted iron. Licking the side of my mouth, I realized I had bitten too hard and was bleeding.

"I was very into it," I deadpanned before leaning on the chair, letting my arms fall on my sides. Suddenly, I jumped from the seat as my muscles ached and wrapped my arms around my body, hissing in pain.

I waited until the pain became bearable, inhaling and exhaling deeply before making my way to the vending machine at the end of the hall to celebrate the end of a harsh battle. And while my stomach churned over the wait for the results, it grumbled as the stress ebbed away as well.

I noticed a familiar figure on the bench in front of the vending machine. My feet stopped for a moment, and I pulled my eyes away in hesitation. "It should be fine," I muttered to myself and continued in a whisper, "I doubt she remembers me." And resumed walking.

"Hello, Ryuugamine-san," I greeted the downcast girl holding a cafe au lait.

The girl lifted her head in surprise. Tightening the hold on the can, she greeted back quietly.

Self-conscious under her gaze, I struggled to make the can of juice fall from the vending machine, pressing buttons in a haste. I frowned at the thought that operating this machine seemed easier than it actually was. But finally, I managed after some trial and error.

Grabbing the drink after a dry clank, I turned around with a friendly smile. "Can I sit there?"

She nodded, scooting ever so slightly in invitation.

I sat down, careful to not make any sudden movements that exposed my apparent exhaustion. Taking a gulp that my stomach gratefully accepted, I stared with curiosity at Ryuugamine-san from the corner of my eye.

She stared at the floor, a frown lightly creasing her forehead. Her long hair and bangs seemed to lack care, yet fairly brushed. Her eyes were a deep navy blue like a wave that protects her soul. She was among the tallest girls in the class, her mature demeanor deceiving her thirteen years of age.

What could the smartest girl in our class be worried about, I vaguely thought, drowsiness hugging my body.

"Do you think you passed the test?" she asked.

I tilted my head to the side. "Ah, um, yes." I smiled.

"I heard what Sakaki-sensei said," she stated.

I inhaled sharply and blinked repeatedly. "Wh-where were you?"

"On the other side of the room. At the threshold." She looked at me from the corner of her eye, her expression stoic and unreadable.

I sighed dramatically. "Of course. The far side."

"I hope you pass. It seems important," she said before sipping her drink.

I nodded, taking a sip to play off the nervousness. My fingers kept trembling and my breathing quickened. All the worries I had pushed away came crashing as the topic caught me unguarded. The test, my future, the Sumire Foundation, the fact that I was useless, and many more.

"Do you still play the violin?" she asked, pulling me back or away from the abyss.

"Hu-huh?" I mumbled dumbly, covering a side of my mouth in a haste to lick away some residue.

She turned to me, her eyes suddenly shinier and hopeful as she repeated, "Do you still play the violin?"

"How do you know?" I breathed out, panic filling my veins. My worst fears played on my ears, complaints filling my hearing. I kept a strong hold of the can, suppressing my trembling fingers.

"You had a solo in the public auditorium a few years ago," she said.

"Oh," I deflated, raging fear ebbing away. I pulled a smile at the fond faraway memory. While I had long forgotten the song we played, in the small string ensemble of the music club I fought for the solo, practicing for days until my fingertips bled. "I remember. Children from schools in the area came. Was yours there?"

"Yeah," she said, "it was beautiful." She smiled fondly. "The violin is fun."

I curled my fist and leaned back, lips tightening. "I am glad you liked it and inspired you." I gazed at her unchanging expression. "I'm not playing anymore, but I haven't forgotten about it."

She nodded with a mix of understanding and determination. Ryuugamine-san was in the concert band club, and I couldn't help but ask to be invited to watch their performance in a competition if there was one.

When she nodded, blue eyes shining like a sapphire in her impassive expression, I regretted those words.

"I'm surprised," I commented after a while, leaning one stretched leg over the other. "I thought you didn't care about socializing with others." The conversations I had witnessed with teachers and our peers didn't stretch for long. She was mostly by herself, including lunch. As far as I had noticed, Ryuugamine-san didn't have close connections with many students in our class.

Her brows fell slightly, but this time, she stared up. "I'm not interested in fitting in or talking to our classmates," she replied without hesitation nor a hint of offense.

My eyes widened slightly, concluding she was like Yuuto, thus the same as Gouenji-kun: a reserved introvert, or an asocial person. It was outside of my understanding.

But, I had spoken too soon.

"I want to become a better musician. I don't want to waste my time with people who will hold me back or make fun of me." Her eyes were as firm as a mountain. Like the gaze I had lost.

"You understand, don't you?" she asked with a hopeful tone, crashing me back to the cruel reality.

My breath got caught in my throat and I bit my lip, wincing at the pain from the previous injury. "Yes, of course I understand," I lied. An unpleasant feeling settled on my stomach. My mind screamed to run away and be spared from the pain of listening to a girl who was able to walk without falling down, but my body was glued to the bench. I left behind that dream to be the heir of the Sumire Foundation, the only dream I ever dared to have.

My body moved on its own when she stood up, asking for her contact information which she was more than happy to give.

"Why. . ." I asked, lips tightening, "Why don't care about what others think? You are the smartest in the whole grade, there must be things people expect you to to be or do."

Her answer left me out of words and threw my world on its head.

She gazed into my eyes for a while, the pressure testing me.

"I don't care what others expect from me. In the end, the only expectations I have to answer are my own."

️️ (^・ω・^ ) ️

Nervousness and panic rose among the soccer club members, the day of the qualifying match a day away. As I observed their passes and teamwork, I was hesitant to confidently answer to Coach Nikaidou that the team would be able to win. My personal worries were elsewhere, not including the test and its consequences. Ryuugamine-san's words seeped in my mind more frequently than I would admit.

"They don't matter?" I said in a low voice, "if it was that easy I would-" Such were the things I found myself muttering, at times a little too loud.

The test was given back that day. Munching my lip with an anxious stomach, I waited for my name to be called. The chair rattled as I pushed it away, and zoomed to the teacher's desk faster than ever before.

A loud "YES!" boomed across the first classrooms.

 **I Had A Dream | End**

Yuu's test score was between the 55s and the 60s lmao. In Japan, to fail a test, the score needs to be lower than the average of the whole class.

Wow, this was a girl-centered chapter XD. Contrary to the previous intention, Miyuki will have more relevance in Yuu's life like Higashi as the person closest to Yuu's heart. I do intend on developing Miyuki and Yuu's relationship and see where it ends up.

Please tell me what you think! Feedback is very much appreciated! I know this chapter isn't its very best. Yuu isn't the type to show her thoughts and feelings when she's in front of an unfamiliar source of stress, keeping them completely away may cause confusion, I believe. I'm not used to writing extroverts in first person but I will do my best (which is why this chapter took so long to put out); your opinion is very much needed.

Next chapter, the qualifying match!

 **Published: April 21st, 2017**

 **Rewritten: February 11th, 2019**


	5. To Betray, Or Not To Betray

**Chapter 4 | To Betray, Or Not To Betray**

"Towels, check. Sports drinks, check. First aid kit, check." I went over the unnecessary list Coach Nikaidou gave me. "Goodness, these are general things. I am not an amateur," I commented before glancing at the boys in red shirts and white trousers warming up on the field. "I'm better at manager work than some of them with soccer," I huffed.

"Did you say something, Sumire-san?" Dandou-kun asked with innocent curiosity beside me.

I shook my head, pulling a smile. "Not at all," I said and turned to the other boys. "Good work everyone," I told the ones that helped with setting up. Even with Mitsumiya and Chiyo-chan's help, I didn't arrive on time because of cleaning duty. Those that had time to spare lent a hand setting up.

"It's good to feel useful when you aren't playing in a match. It's like we are guests or something," Dandou-kun said, pumping his fists like a child. As the junior goalkeeper, he certainly had a lot of free time. "Manager is work is harder than I thought."

I nodded. "It's definitely harder than it seems as well. You get used to it with time."

"Gouenji wasn't able to complete Fire Tornado. Will we able to win this?" Nakai-senpai asked, walking over after he finished warming up.

"There's always next year, right? And most of us are first years anyway," Mogi-kun added, reaching for his foot as he stretched on the ground.

I frowned. "Didn't you-"

"We decided we'll aim for the Football Frontier, didn't we? If you make excuses at this time, you'll make them next year," Fukazawa-kun reproached.

I stared at him and hummed playfully. The boys changed the topic, and I turned back to the pitch, gaze setting on Gouenji-kun.

"He's definitely worried," I whispered. I took a step forward, leaping back as I realized my intentions. "What?" I yelped. "Why did I want to lift him up?" I shook my head and glared.

 _'Frustrating, isn't it? Not being able to answer your own expectations,'_ I thought. Biting my lip, I turned away as Nosei middle school entered the grounds.

️️ (^・ω・^ ) ️

"What sort of team is Nosei?" I asked Yuuto a few days before the match.

"Putting it in few words, they are a team that specializes in air tactics." He smirked. "If they can't perfect Fire Tornado, they have no chances to win in their own game. But that only gives them a small chance."

I bit the other corner of my lip hard. Witnessing how our defense tightened, Nosei's agile midfielders snickered as they slipped between the players.

"Not even defending pushes them back for long," I said.

"They are like the wind moving between the cracks," Dandou-kun commented. As the reserve goalkeeper, we would also share the bench on a regular basis during matches.

I glanced around me. Dandou-kun was sitting beside me and the Coach was standing on the other side. Their victory or loss meant nothing to me but I was their manager.

"We are done, " Ishii-senpai said at Dandou-kun's left.

"Don't speak so fast!" I pressed, crossing one leg over the other and peering closer. "At least not until the first half."

The ball went back and forth, halftime beeping to a score of zero-zero. Everyone exhaled in unison.

"That's was so tiresome!" Dandou-kun exclaimed. "And I wasn't in the pitch!"

The players came back panting and sweating, a strong odor infesting my nostrils as they approached.

I covered my nose. "Ew." Standing up, I told the two reserve players to help with the sports drinks and towels.

When I returned to the bench, I saw a lone bottle and towel. Soon, I found they belonged to Gouenji-kun. Hissing in annoyance at two who didn't give him the items, I took them before walking up to said boy.

"Here." I handed the items with a small smile, his pained expression still stuck. I made a mediocre effort to cheer the boy in front of me. "Hold it there. I know you can do it."

"Do you have any ideas?" He breathed out after gulping down the drink.

"No, I don't," I lied, feigning guilty look. I placed a foot behind the other, tapping in a four-four time.

"Will you call time out if you think of something?!" He exclaimed, taking a step forward.

I took a step back, leaning backward under his expectant gaze. "The Coach calls timeouts," I pointed out nervously, my heart skipping a beat in surprise. I hesitated between looking away or facing him. We had paid our favors after all.

"I mean if you will tell the Coach to call timeout if you think of something," he rearranged his words, lowering his tone.

"That-That. . . um. . ." I blinked to think of an answer as information overwhelmed my brain: silence and pressure around us settled like a mantle; the internal pleasure of being begged, and the mental weight and consequences of my reply. My heart kept beating against my ribcage as an accompaniment.

"Why do you. . . want to win?" I asked, gaze unable to settle.

"Because I want to face soccer head-on," he replied without hesitation.

I stared deep into his onyx eyes: honest, pure, youthful; like a child. Then, my eyes drifted to the windows on the nearby building, locking with Ryuugamine-san.

Waking from an odd reverie, I quickly took another step back from the boy in front of me. "I will see what I can do," I told Gouenji-kun.

He nodded. "I'm counting on you."

The whistle rang.

I bit my lip and gazed at Gouenji-kun's leaving figure, glancing back at the windows.

Meeting Ryuugamine-san's gaze once again, she turned away and left.

I sighed dramatically. "Where relationships this hard?"

️️ (^・ω・^ ) ️

Tapping my foot incessantly, I dwelled on whether or not to help Gouenji-kun. After that scene, the team had some expectation I would, staring as if I was going to be their savior.

I recalled the oldest Mukata's taunt before returning to the field: _"It's not like you have to, like yeah. It's impossible for a manager to be that capable. Just focus on handling bottles and towels, like yeah."_

My eyebrow twitched. I lifted my head to Coach Nikaidou. "Coach, you haven't given any orders yet?"

"I will when Nosei scores a goal or before it ends. Whichever happens first."

I nodded. "Then I will say something then," I said without assuring victory.

The worst case scenario occurred ten minutes in the second half. Nosei scored with Condor Drive, its speed surprising Nanzan-senpai. Coach Nikaidou told them to keep the defense strong, and to Gouenji-kun to use the incomplete Fire Tornado to score when the time was right.

"Take them by surprise," the coach finished with confidence. Everyone replied in unison. I told Gouenji-kun to remember the training and replicate what felt right. Making the hissatsu able to tear Nosei defense was important.

The first try was a complete failure. Not only because of its poor execution but because it gave enough time for the goalkeeper to prepare.

The soccer ball bounced off the frame. I sighed and facepalmed.

"Look out!" Gouenji-kun shouted, a little too worried. Opening my eyes, my view was filled with white and black pentagons before my nose screamed in pain and the world flipping on its head.

"Ah! Ahhhhhhh!" I covered my face, gritting my teeth to hold back the tears. The pain drowned the worried yells.

In a hurry, I pushed my body upwards with the other elbow, ignoring any hands in the corner of my eyes. I was taken to the infirmary when a drop of blood fell on the grass, stopping any protest.

After being checked for a bone fracture, I was given an ice pack and a towel to cover my nose. I refused to go to a hospital in case the anemia worsened the bleeding, but I reassured the nurse I would go after the match when I realized her genuine concern.

The nurse sighed with a smile. "All of you kids in sports clubs put the team in front of your own health. Youth."

I grimaced and looked away. "What will happen to the match now?" I mumbled to my company.

"I have no idea." Dandou-kun sighed in exasperation. His face fell and he twiddled his thumbs. "Maybe we should give up."

I fell silent. Being absent from the field caused anxiety to shake me from the inside. "If Nosei were to score a goal, we would hear the students yell," I muttered as if to reassure us.

"You are really worried, Sumire-san," Dandou-kun said with a smile, a hint of gloom in his voice. "I wasn't sure if it mattered to you even if you are always helping us out."

His words made me recall Gouenji-kun's a week ago: _"I didn't take you to go out of your way to help someone."_ And if I was the person Yuuto said I was, being a manager was the job least suited for me. Unless I benefited from it.

"Do I?" I replied blankly, looking away. Kidokawa's win in no way benefited me, so I had no reason to help them. But. . . perhaps I did care. I was part of Gouenji-kun's efforts to master the hissatsu after all.

As if to tear through my doubts, a violin pierced through the awkward air. We lifted our heads, quiet. Seconds passed, a tune like a bird's chirp flooding the room, perhaps the whole building.

"The Lark Ascending," the nurse explained. "It's beautiful."

"Ryuugamine-san," I said in awe; she was the only violinist in the band. Each note was so rich and precise. "As if she was a bird, flying away from everything that ties us down. Subverting expectations. Someone that wants to leave this boring world." I clenched my fists, my chest filled with the same magnetism I felt the previous day. "It is the world people like Gouenji-kun want to reach."

And me.

Dandou-kun stared at me with a confused expression. Ignoring it, I stared upwards. I felt as if I was in a prairie, an endless blue sky spreading over my head. The dark, suffocating forest was nowhere to be seen.

"I played this piece that day," I realized. "I wanted to tell them that they too can stand out."

My lips tightened, and I stood up. I was fully aware I would regret the consequences but I would be a hypocrite if I stood by. Indeed, I was the person Yuuto described but there was an exception to this rule. And it started with him.

"Let's go, Dandou-kun. We have a match to win."

️️ (^・ω・^ ) ️

Fifteen minutes before the match ended, the score had changed one to one. In the bench, Ishii-senpai was replaced with Kurobe-kun. The team kept the 4-3-3 formation.

I asked the member of the newspaper club who was recording the match to show me Gouenji-kun's latest attempt at Fire Tornado. To their protest, I told them there wouldn't be a match to write about if we lost and got what I wanted.

"I see. If we adjust this, he might be able to-"

I quickly asked the Coach his opinion and saw as the blub in his eyes lit up. Calling timeout, the players assembled.

"Boys, this will be the last play." He explained his tactic, slipping in the hint I found, and gave a final pep talk. "Play without regrets. Not because of the Football Frontier but because of soccer itself. That's why you are here, right?"

"Yes!" Everyone replied.

I met Gouenji-kun's expectant eyes, sparkling with youth and burning a desire to win. I knew he had done his absolute best with figuring the hissatsu and that that hope was growing thin.

"Gouenji-kun," I called, "This will be perhaps the last time I say this: _Forget the manual, the drawings. Everything but what feels right._ " Yet, it was merely a hunch. It was through Gouenji-kun's effort that Fire Tornado had to come alive.

His eyes widened, and the team began to murmur among themselves. I continued. "We don't have visual records of the hissatsu but written and our imaginations. However, we have been so focused on imitating rather than creating. Hissatsus are like pieces of art. Give it your style. Follow your heart."

Gouenji-kun stared awestruck before staring at the Coach as if for confirmation. He nodded.

Gouenji-kun stared back at me. "Yes!" he replied firmly. A moment later, the team went back to the field.

I exhaled deeply. "If we lose now, at least I will be satisfied for doing all I could."

"Gouenji-kun may be the captain, but I can't deny you are more suited to lead the team, Sumire," Coach Nikaidou said.

"Eh?" I perked up. "Is that so?" I swiped my eyes around the grass, looking for an answer. Yet, I found nothing but reassurance and glee. I giggled bashfully.

Time moved backwards, the end of the match that will decide the club's future near. Ishii-senpai was able to steal the ball back, and the midfielders brought the ball forward with short passes. It was thanks to the triplets excellent teamwork that they reached the penalty area.

I noticed some hesitation to pass the ball to Gouenji-kun.

"You better make it, Gouenji!" the middle Mukata yelled, kicking the ball to the boy.

Gouenji-kun caught it and jumped to the sky. Using a different tempo, rotation, and leg, a string of fire wrung around him. The ball was covered in fire, blazing through the goalkeeper's hissatsu and into the net.

The end whistle blew. Cheers filled the school. The team jumped, some hugging each other. Students surrounded Gouenji-kun, burying him in a mass of euphoric congratulations.

I covered my mouth, nausea upsetting my stomach. Taking a step back from the joyful ambiance, now dull and distant, I realized I never belonged there until now, but I couldn't go back to being that man's spy.

I had become a traitor, and there would be consequences.

 **To Betray, Or Not To Betray | End**

Ahhhhhhhhh, I'm so excited to publish this chapter! The biggest motivation for Yuu to betray Kageyama has been revealed and it will be expanded on a new scene with Kidou in What Is Lost. I'm not used to writing soccer matches so I kind of breezed through this one but do let me know if I should have added more about it. I will do my best.

Again, the song mentioned is attached in the media. I could take a nice nap with it, and I am sure Yuu would sleep like a baby with it too. A few days ago, I went to a concert that played a piece with an oboe solo. I fell asleep XD. It's such a pretty instrument.

This concludes the rewrite of the beginning! Everyone, thank you so much for your patience!

 **Published: May 9th, 2017**

 **Rewritten: February 12th, 2019**


	6. To Each Their Own Carrot

He was terrified of the man in front of him. The reason he had given up his dream, trampled on it like a filthy thing, stared at him through dark-tinted glasses. He had seen him from close-up about twice but this was the first they were in the same room alone, face-to-face. Despite his mind telling him to run, his feet remained planted in the red carpet. Fear had frozen him.

"You have been skipping club to observe the soccer team," the Coach said in a deep voice that resonated through the dim office. He felt weak and mediocre, facts he had accepted, but the Coach went further and shoved them down his throat. He didn't answer and the man continued.

"You know it's against the rules, don't you?" His emotions must have shown on his face, for the man's words contained a hint of amusement. He nodded immediately and looked down, blonde locks covering his eyes. He gulped. It wasn't that he was being careful or ashamed of being caught red-handed. The possibility of being found and its consequences hadn't crossed his mind. No one cared enough to warn him.

"If you don't want to be punished, be useful and spy Kidokawa Seishuu's soccer team. If you succeed and prove yourself worthy of being in my team, there will be another tryout for Teikoku's second team when you return."

It took a few seconds for the words to sink. He raised his head slowly, a dumbstruck expression on his face and the man cracked a devilish grin.

"...Understood," the boy replied seconds later without hesitation. He would do anything to play soccer as long as it didn't taint his heart any further.


	7. Peeking Behind The Bush

**Chapter 6 | Peeking Behind The Bush**

I hissed as my neck was stung for the umpteenth time. After excusing myself when Coach Nikaidou gathered the team for a briefing about tomorrow's match, I carefully surveyed the bathrooms and the nearby area where Gouenji-kun's fans used to hide.

I felt my face scrunch in a frown. "After the qualifying match, Gouenji-kun has indeed become more popular. However, not that many girls come after school like before," I commented with suspicion as I looked around.

Because of that scene during the match, I was caught between the popular captain and his growing unofficial fan club, speculations we were together whispered around. I would careless less about it if the classroom's mood wasn't slowly getting swallowed by the growing vines of jealousy from the small group that was heavily infatuated with the captain. My worries were on explaining myself to Ryuugamine-san who was far enough to misunderstand.

"Ouch!" I winced again and stood in place near one of the school buildings. A moment later, I glared at the lack of results. My self-control was melting like an ice cube, its temperature rising rapidly.

Before reaching the boiling point, my ears perked up at a strange rustle of leaves in the nearby bushes. My eyes immediately fell on them; they were tall enough for two, maybe three, crouched teens to hide in.

I dove in without hesitation but care. Branches cracked down my feet, and my breath got caught in my throat, the noise too loud to have gone unnoticed. After an unmoving moment, the surroundings were quiet save from my own breathing. I pressed on.

Pushing away a thick leaf, there was a blonde boy with a pair of binoculars fixed at the direction of the soccer field.

"Who are you?!" I blurted out as my expectations overthrew the current sight.

The boy jumped with a silly scream causing me to cover my ears and fell on his behind with a curse.

I exhaled sharply as my violet eyes met his brown ones. Still seconds passed as we examined each other's face. And I asked again, with an edge for good measure, "Who are you?"

The boy looked away as his shoulders shook, revealing a silver earring that gleamed under the soft rays.

It clicked. "You are that transfer student," I said. The recent rumors about a blonde pretty boy among the second years whom I didn't bother to put a name to had some girls in an uproar. Perhaps the girls from the upper grades were flocking around him instead. "Why are you. . ." I trailed off, looking at the binoculars hanging around his neck and a notepad under his hand. My brain put together the pieces. I stared at him intently with wide eyes and spoke without emotion, "Why did that man send you?"

The blonde flinched as if that vague reference meant something. I sprung from the ground and walked away.

️ (^・ω・^ ) ️

That man gazed at us with an amused grin as if the current event was his plan all along. Yuuto and that boy stood aside, the one who had called for this meeting in the very center.I stood with an unwavering posture, arms crossed confidently with a scowl. "Ryuugamine-senpai is not fit to be a spy," I broke the silence.

"Hm? And why are you saying this?" He taunted, challenging me to play his game. Ryuugamine-senpai was no obstacle, it was that man.

"He was in a _bush,_ with a pair of binoculars!" I pointed out, throwing my hands aside. "There are only so many excuses one can think up at that moment if they were found!"

That man rested against his chair, too calm for my liking. "I don't care about his methods. Likewise, I didn't care about yours."

I exhaled deeply, patience running out. 'What kind of joke is this?' I thought as I passed my hands around my temples. "Commander," I didn't hesitate to say, "it took me less than a minute to find out his affiliation. He is from Teikoku, transfered at the eve of the Football Frontier. " I stared at the boy in question, his body language wider than an open book. "And he doesn't know to lie," I concluded. "What merit is there to have him?!" I turned back. "You know the best liar is me."

"Certainly, your abilities are unparalleled. Someone who lies to themselves is the fittest to be a spy. That is why I decided to change."

My ears perked up at the roundabout praise. Without a trace of shame, I was genuinely happy until his next words.

"You will be relieved from your duties and you have won the right to stay at Kidokawa. What else do you want?"

My mouth was shut for a moment, considering what that man said. "I want to stay with them," I said as an image of Gouenji-kun flashed through my mind. My fists clenched. _'I have a responsibility towards him. I want Kidokawa to win.'_

There was silence. That man stared at me, trying to find the meaning behind my words.

"Can you believe in someone who hasn't even given the hint to protect themselves?" I asked, glancing at the unmoving boy. It was oddly disturbing.

"Why do you have to say about you being a better choice?" he asked, changing the topic."I have gotten close to Gouenji-kun. That is what you want, don't you?" I smirked. "I asked around, and it seems Ryuugamine-senpai here has no social skills." I shrugged. His lack of reaction made the atmosphere much more awkward. He couldn't read the mood at all."I won't be found," I assured.

"Commander," Yuuto called, breaking my tempo, "did you read his report about Fire Tornado?"

"I have, it's quality is impressive," that man said.

"Really?" I blurted out.

"Better than what you have brought me."

My eye twitched, and I hummed. "It does not hold much weight if he can be found this easily." I had to control the information that man receives to protect the team. Yielding wasn't an option.

That man leaned back. "Kidou, what are the chances she can be trusted?" he asked.

I inhaled sharply and turned to Yuuto who swallowed softly and tightened his lips. I stared at him intently, unable to predict his choice.

"Zero, Commander," he replied, choosing that man's side. "It's true-"

"What is your basis?" I interrupted cooly. "It's rude to blame someone without evidence.

"Yuuto walked briskly towards me, his shadow towering over my figure. "Give me the notebook," he demanded between his teeth.

I took a step back, trying to hang on my sanity and composure as the light dimmed.

He snatched the notebook I hurriedly took out of my bag and skimmed through it. Stopping at the last pages, his brows narrowed further, and I knew he was glaring at me before trotting to that man and slamming the notebook against the table.

"You don't change," Yuuto said to me without turning back.

My heart seemed to stop. I inhaled sharply again and stared at that man as he scanned the page. Staying in place, I evaded his gaze when he understood the meaning behind the sketch of Fire Tornado I drew.

Ryuugamine-senpai peeked from the corner of his eye. Curious, interested.

I waited for that man's words, biting my lip.

That man smirked at Yuuto. "Good work." He then looked forward, knitting his fingers once again and spoke with an absolute tone. "Whoever can bring a certain hissatsu hidden in Kidokawa will receive what you want. Use whatever method necessary. Kidou will give you the rest of the details. You are dismissed."

 **Peeking Behind The Bush | End**

Yup, why did I rewrote this chapter as well when it wasn't in the plan? I realized this chapter is also important as it builds up on Yuu's motivations and how and the lengths she is willing to go for her goals. Plus, other things about her character. I hope she seems different from the original draft for the old readers. While I'm glad the new ones and can enjoy this decent female character who can defend herself.

 **Published: September 30th, 2017**

 **Rewritten: February 20th, 2019**


	8. Beware of The Eagle

Peeking from the window, the student council room was pitch black. Kiyoshi grimaced. It hadn't been long since he was called through the speakers to come to this room in the special building, or so they called it. Tapping his foot impatiently, he weighed his options: stay here and wait for a member of the council or come back in a while.

He had successfully managed to infiltrate Kidokawa Seishuu on the eve of the Football Frontier. His cover was that of a random student selected to transfer and build trust between the schools. It was probably the student council's job to overlook he was adjusting well as they handled most of the student affairs. The Coach told him he would have been ordered to join the soccer club under normal circumstances, and that's exactly what worried Kiyoshi. From the moment he accepted the offer, the situation was abnormal. Kiyoshi gritted his teeth and stomped his foot. And it was this abnormal situation led him to get caught. He had scouted the area around the field and found the perfect spot to spy the team. If he hadn't given Kidou-san the report about Fire Tornado, the Coach for sure would have failed him. He would be back to Teikoku gazing at the soccer club's practice with broken dreams. Now he was given the real mission, find the missing manuals for Tornado Legend, Kidokawa Seishu's ghost hissatsu. On top, he still had to submit weekly reports. No, he didn't have time to waste.

After giving one last bitter look through the glass, Kiyoshi huffed and began to walk away from the door. As if on cue, it blasted open. But before Kiyoshi could understand the situation, the room's darkness swallowed him whole.

"Hey, Teikoku boy," a masculine voice said as the two were enveloped in darkness, the door shutting close behind them.

Kiyoshi instinctively threw a punch in the voice's apparent direction, and it was caught with ease. The grip was tight like that of a trained athlete. Something dug into his fist's flesh, a wave of cold terror crawled deep into his body.

He screamed, his voice echoing beside it at the threat of certain death. Or worse, perpetual pain.

Between ragged pants, Kiyoshi heard a delighted chuckle beside his ear, warm breath tickling the hair on his neck.

The lights turned on. Kiyoshi shut his eyes instinctively, opening them to meet a pair of muddy eyes before looking away for his bangs to provide a safe cover. The boy was close.

Seconds passed, the boy releasing the grip from his fist without a word. There were carving marks between his knuckles.

Kiyoshi raised his head and shot the boy a cold glare, his voice flat, "What was that?"

A grin broke on the boy's face, taunting Kiyoshi to land a punch, "A greeting."

"What kind of greeting is that?!" He barked, his words quivering at the end. Who the fuck tries to scare someone to death? His heart almost stopped.

The boy chuckled, gazing down at Kiyoshi's trembling figure.

Kiyoshi growled, his teeth gritting loudly. A dull scar ached in his chest. The dust, the cold, and the tears were still lucid. It wasn't a wound time could heal. The fear was ingrained in him like second nature.

If he was caught so easily then the lack of training, among other things, had caught up with him. Deep down, his pride took a blow of letting a mere student from a public school prank him. However, he had clung to life desperately. He still wanted to live. It wouldn't let him die either way.

The boy had moved to the center of the room when Kiyoshi was getting a hold of himself and spoke casually as if nothing had happened. "I'm Kensou Saburo, treasurer of the student council. Nice to meet you, Kiyoshi."

Kiyoshi's fists unclenched, anger fading like a balloon whose air was taken out. "What. . . what are you doing here?"

But Kensou Saburo shrugged as if it wasn't a matter of importance. "More importantly, what are you doing here?" he asked with an interested gaze, "it's obviously due to Kageyama but what did you do to be sent to spy on Kidokawa?"

Kiyoshi looked away. He had no reason to answer that. He saw Kensou shrug again from the corner of his eye and a small breath escaped his lips.

"Sit down," Kensou said as he rested on the couch like it was his throne. It didn't seem like an offer. Kiyoshi tentatively obeyed, taking the couch beside him.

Giving a long look at Kensou who had propped his feet on the coffee table, Kiyoshi noticed his lean figure and deep brown hair that framed a face. His mature, dignified demeanor was that of a well-educated person.

But he was still on guard. Whoever knew of his objective and wasn't allied with the Coach couldn't be trusted.

"What are your plans?" Kensou asked.

Kiyoshi chose his words carefully. "I'm not sure yet." It wasn't a lie. He had a few options but hadn't chosen what to do.

Kensou heard him bored and Kiyoshi's eyebrow twitched.

"Join the student council." Again, Kensou wasn't offering. "You don't know what club to join either, am I right?"

". . .Uhn." Kiyoshi agreed but was reluctant to take the offer. He had to look for a club where his absence meant little and its activities were irrelevant to others. It could be a big club with many members or a laid-back club. The student council didn't meet any of those qualifications.

Kensou stood up and walked to, his demeanor taking an unexpected change. "Who do you think convinced the president to let you into the school?"

Kiyoshi tried letting his tone topple him, waiting for his next words with a frown.

"The student council knows why you are here, Kiyoshi. Did you really think they were stupid enough to not suspect a transfer student from Teikoku? How long do you think Kageyama has been doing this?" Not waiting for his reply, Kensou continued." Join the student council," his voice took a cheeky tone, "I'll help you."

"Why?! What do you get from it?" Kiyoshi said hurriedly. This was enemy territory; he had taken too long to realize. They were less than acquaintances back then.

Kensou grinned, very much like Kidou-san, but it was much more polished. "You will get the freedom to move around the school and authority. Motives shouldn't be your concern. You don't want to get caught spying behind a bush, do you?"

Kiyoshi felt his cheeks warm; the image of the little girl scaring him was still vivid in his mind. Kensou's logic made sense. His meeting with Sumire Yuu made him realize he was taking too many risks. He could use the authority of the student council to get close to the club and get much information. With their backup, it was unlikely people would suspect a transfer student was a spy for Teikoku. Instead of hiding in the shadows, he could walk in the light with ease. He wasn't tempted by the offer of power, but the ways said power would be useful to him.

"I have to refuse," he said politely. It was too good to be true. Kensou's motive was the biggest issue. And Kiyoshi doesn't want to be anyone else's tool.

Kensou's face twitched, and the hand he placed on Kiyoshi's shoulder felt dangerous. He looked down at him like an eagle about to grip his prey. "I'm not giving you an option, Kiyoshi," he said slowly. "Join the student council. Or leave the school."

A shiver shook Kiyoshi's spine. When Kensou grinned diabolically, the meaning of his statement dawned on him.

"Join the student council or your cover will be blown."

"You bastard." Kiyoshi's body shook and slapped away Kensou's hand. "What are you planning?" He met Kensou's muddy eyes. With how apathetic Kiyoshi treated others, it was almost comical he disliked the guy in less than an hour.

"Revenge," Kensou sneered, "against the most powerful figure in the soccer world."


	9. A Dog's Loyalty

Kiyoshi plopped on his bed as soon as he got home, burying his face in the pillow. His body felt heavy, and a dense cloud rested on him. Tightening his jaw from the hammering headache he was suffering, he clutched his head, hot tears spilling as quiet sobs left his lips.

"I'm an idiot. I'm a fucking idiot," he said between sharp sobs.

He had become someone's tool again.

He shouldn't have believed the Coach. Kiyoshi readily accepted everything would be prepared for him and that being his tool was a vital step to get into Teikoku's team. That was _okay_ because he was nothing without soccer. He _needed_ the extra help.

But being Kensou's tool was different. Kiyoshi could already see it: Absolute obedience, worthless opinions, insults, submission. It was rinse and repeat. He couldn't get away from this fate.

He should give up already. He couldn't stand the cycle. He just wanted to play soccer. Why was it so hard?

No, he already knew the answer. He deserved this. After all he had done... it was his punishment.

It was his fault. Yes, everything was his fault.

...

"So," his friend said, sitting on top of the slide. "The girl whom you were supposed to take the job from found you."

"Y-Yeah," Kiyoshi grumbled, "Basically that."

The boy muffled a laugh, looking away with a stiff expression and a faint curving in his lips as if he was holding in a yawn.

"D-Don't laugh, Keima!" Kiyoshi glowered, cheeks painted with a growing blush, "She jumped at me from behind while I was focused on watching their practice!"

And on top of it, she had to be a girl. Even if she was rich, it was embarrassing how he was paralyzed with terror.

"Sorry, sorry." Keima waved a hand, then zoomed down the slide.

Kiyoshi jumped, backing away as Keima slid to him at high speed and stood up. "At least it was that girl, Sumire Yuu, right? If someone else had found you, it would have been harder to make up an excuse," Keima said, dusting off his pants.

Kiyoshi shrugged and walked to the bench, crouching beside a calico cat nibbling on a treat. "Have you heard of that hissatsu?" he said while petting the cat's head.

"Tornado Legend?" Keima asked, "Not at all. I'll ask around though. Triple hissatsus are rare."

Kiyoshi snapped his head back to Keima, steadying his posture. "No! If people suddenly start talking about it, the Coach will know it was me," he warned. He wouldn't forgive himself if Keima got hurt because of him. Being around him was dangerous enough, but he couldn't push Keima away again.

"Okay." Keima nodded seriously. "I'll search on my own."

Kiyoshi stood up in a haste. "Keima, no!" he yelled. "This was the mission I was given. I can't let you do my job."

"Then how can I help?" Keima protested, brows furrowing. "There must be something."

Kiyoshi thought for a moment. "You are fine this way," he said quietly, gazing at the ground.

"Kiyoshi, I want to help you." Kiyoshi looked at his friend between the top of his glasses and cap as Keima clenched his fists. It wasn't like him to sound that desperate. A vague nostalgia lifted his guard, unconsciously narrowing his eyes. It had been just a year, but it seems to be enough for Kiyoshi to forget some of Keima's mannerisms, save from his soccer style.

"Kei," Kiyoshi said softly, "you are doing enough." He cracked a small smile to reassure him, confirming his feeling of gratefulness beforehand. "I'm glad you are worried about me. Really."

Honestly, one person who worried about his well-being meant the world. If he were truly alone, he would give up on the mission after the first day at Kidokawa. Kiyoshi needed a friend to lean on and talk to, and having Keima around made him happy. Happier than he had been for the past year.

Nevertheless, Kiyoshi was satisfied his current pure self: he didn't lie to himself, didn't force himself to do things he didn't want to, didn't plaster fake smiles to get along with his classmates. And Keima accepted his perspective, his desire to stay pure until the end.

Keima's shoulders relaxed, also bringing a sense of relief on Kiyoshi. His body recognized the anxiety the situation brought, but his mind hadn't caught up yet.

 _What was putting Keima on edge?_ He should know. But he couldn't put it into words.

". . . Ok." Keima's jade green eyes flickered with sadness, their usual luster returning a moment later. "Tell me when you need help, okay?" He smiled.

"Thank you, really," Kiyoshi replied with a small, sincere smile. Keima was keeping his promise. Kiyoshi appreciated the space his friend was giving him to work at his own pace.

". . . There is something else." Kiyoshi continued after refilling the plate for the other cat. He gave Keima a look, hoping his body language and tone conveyed it was bad news.

He spoke after receiving Keima's concerned reply. Kiyoshi told him about Kensou, the fact that he had joined the student council as his assistant, and that Kensou wanted to use him. When Kiyoshi asked Kidou-san if he knew about the guy's whereabouts, he answered they were unknown after confirming with the Coach. So Kensou was acting alone, and they didn't know he was attending Kidokawa.

Kiyoshi sat on the bench and pulled his knees up, burying his face in his legs. His luck was terrible.

"I don't want to be used anymore," he said wistfully.

He had enough as a replacement for Keima back then, his hysterical mother, and now he was trapped in the eagle's nest.

"Kiyoshi. . ." Keima trailed off, "You want to be a pro, don't you?! This is nothing. You passed Teikoku's entrance exam for that, right? You studied like crazy to get a scholarship. Is this really harder than everything you have already gone through?"

Keima's last words made Kiyoshi tremble.

Kiyoshi lifted his face, chin downwards. "N-No matter h-how hard I try, I always end up being used. It has nothing to do with Teikoku or the mission. . . It's like a cycle I c-can't run away from." Kiyoshi's voice lowered to a whisper as if admitting defeat. "First the Coach and now Kensou."

"So what?" Keima declared. "Is that really more important than your dream? You can't let this bring you down."

Kiyoshi felt as if a bomb exploded in his stomach. He pushed himself off the bench, eyes blazing and clenched fists ready to punch. "Mother was happy I quit soccer so I could focus on my studies! You know how painful her criticism is! You have seen it before! I don't want to be used because I don't be a tool! I hate it!" Kiyoshi shouted, coughing immediately after. This stupid idiot's habit of ignoring things never failed to piss him off.

"You are right. I know all that. I'm sorry," Keima's voice quivered apologetically.

Kiyoshi heard meowing in the distance, followed by a soft brush against his thigh.

The calico cat gazed at him with worried, yellow eyes. Then the black cat with white mittens he was waiting for appeared beside it, brushing its furry head against his leg.

". . . I don't know what's going on with me," Keima said in a small voice.

Kiyoshi frowned. "I hate to be used by selfish people who only think of themselves." His voice was firm and spiteful.

". . . I'm so sorry," Keima trembled. "You know at that time I wasn't. . ."

Kiyoshi sat back, ignoring Keima's words.

The calico jumped on his thighs, propping its legs on Kiyoshi's chest to lick his nose; its soothing purr was comforting. The black cat nudged its head against his arm, taking his sleeve after meowing in a gesture to play.

Kiyoshi chuckled softly. Those two never failed to cheer him up. They were special to him. Just like this abandoned park. It was his secret place. He rarely bumped into other people.

"Have you thought of what I could do for you? I would really do anything," Keima said cautiously.

Kiyoshi lifted his eyes, having Keima on the corner of his sight. ". . . I haven't decided. Sorry."

Keima waved his hand breezily. "It's fine. Tell me when you know."

Kiyoshi exhaled slowly, his mind cooling down in the process. It wasn't Keima's intention to sound apathetic. Just like most of the time he sounded rude, sometimes Keima sounded indifferent. This time it just really got under his skin.

He lifted his head. "I want to fulfill our promise to fix our relationship."

Keima smiled lightly. "Me too."

That's when it finally clicked.

The month before summer vacation Keima becomes irritable, emotional, and a mess. Even if Kiyoshi was Kin's replacement, that didn't help Keima at all. It had been his duty since Keima confessed his problem. He just didn't imagine it would fall in this exact month.

Kiyoshi hesitated, slightly embarrassed at the words that were floating in his mind. He should say it for the sake of their friendship, Keima's loyalty, and himself. "H-hey, Ke-Kei. . . . L-let me protect you. As thanks for w-what you have d-done for me."

Keima blushed, retreating a few steps until he bumped against the slide. "Wa-Wait?! I already owe you. I can't let you do that!"

Kiyoshi chuckled, a warm flutter expanded in his body, and walked to him. He gave Keima a sweet smile, a gesture he proudly showed off to the ones he held dear enhanced by his looks. "I remembered. It's _that_ month, isn't it? You can use my shoulder."

Keima shook his head furiously. "You are already going through so much! I can't let you bear this too!"

Kiyoshi cocked his head, giving off a mischievous smile. "Kei, you know I wouldn't be saying this if I wasn't sure could handle it."

Keima raised a skeptic eyebrow. "Are you really sure?" Kiyoshi could tell his friend was trying to accept help and was confirming if Kiyoshi could truly do so.

"Yup!" he answered cheerily without hesitation.

"Okay. . ." Keima looked between Kiyoshi and a random point. "Just for this month."


	10. What Is Lost

"Yes." I sighed as I laid on the couch. "That man made a fool of us."

"I would have never thought it would become like this. Everything seemed. . . okay," Higashi-san said, gazing at her hands.

"Even Yuuto was dumbfounded." With a groan, I reminisced about the aftermath of the meeting.

After we had been dismissed from that man's office, I hesitated to approach Kidou who seemed to be lost in thought. Swallowing the embarrassment, I trudged.

"Did you know about that?" I asked with a mixture of disbelief and defeat. My objective had been overturned after all.

Kidou frowned and shook his head slowly. "I knew about Ryuugamine being transferred to Kidokawa and investigating Fire Tornado, not about that hissatsu."

"Tornado Legend. . ?" I said, testing the foreign words in my mouth. "I can't believe it is related to Fire Tornado and Dark Tornado."

"It was used during one of the matches between Kidokawa and Teikoku years ago. Teikoku almost lost." Kidou gazed at Ryuugamine-senpai's leaving figure, his expression stoic.

My jaw tightened. Following my hand moving to Kidou's sleeve, it craved to pull it and wrap my arms around his.

I shook my head and looked away. "So, it is a threat." I crossed my arms and smiled wryly. "The best way to eliminate a threat is subduing it. That's something he would do." I turned to the door we just left and told myself in a slow mumble, "Efficient and immoral."

Kidou returned his gaze and agreed thoughtfully, unaware of my last words.

I tilted my head. "Is there something bothering you?" I glanced down for a second and clasped my arm. "Um, I don't think that man doesn't trust you. I believe it's because he thought you might mention it to me." I giggled. "You are extremely curious after all."

"Yeah." Kidou smiled painfully as if trying to brush his worry off.

After making sure Ryuugamine-senpai was out of sight, I clasped his hand, massaging the back with my thumb. "You won't be thrown away that easily, Yuuto. Your talents can't be replaced. You yourself can't be replaced."

His muscles slowly relaxed as I spoke and I noticed I was holding my breath.

I smiled at this familiar tension. "You are still a child, Yuuto."

We headed home, and I stopped Higashi-san from leaving when she brought a cup of tea.

Still on the couch, I shifted the other way and hugged one of the pillows. "I had to tell Yuuto why I chose to betray that man." My gaze lowered for a moment to the beige rug. "He had the right to know."

"To. . ." Higashi-san pondered, "prove your worth to the partners of the Sumire Foundation, was it?"

I flinched, feeling the blood rushing to my face. "Y-yes, basically. " Pushing myself to a sitting position, I pressed the pillow against my body. "I disappointed everyone by not taking over my parent's position, by not doing anything. I hurt them. It's unforgivable. It wasn't uncommon in other eras for children to take over an empire or an organization. Like Tutankhamon . . . they accomplished great things at their young age." I mumbled, "Or is it because we live in modern times?"

Higashi-san laughed dryly as if lost. "It's been two years. I wouldn't have been able to heal in such a short time."

I dug my nails deeper into the pillow.

". . ."

I could still see the sadness in Tsukichi-san's eyes when she said she was leaving the school. The Sumire Foundation, my parents, were supporting her family. But that man wasn't known for being merciful.

But the worst was-

"Kidou-sama and I aren't blaming you." Higashi-san's kind words hauled me back from the rising darkness.

I nodded and looked around before burying my face on the pillow. "I'm sorry, Tsukichi-san. I betrayed my best friend. But I will assume responsibility. I won't let that man toy with the Sumire Foundation anymore." My voice shook. "It was my fault you became like that."

️ (^・ω・^ ) ️

The following morning began as usual. I slept early, so my body could feel lighter and my sight stayed sharp. I could almost believe yesterday didn't happen.

Humming on the way to the field, I noticed the commotion in front of the clubroom. The team should have been preparing for practice.

The hairs on my neck stood up. I picked up the pace.

"Gouenji-kun, what happened?!" I asked between breaths. His downcast expression only confirmed this ugly feeling.

"Fire Tornado's manual was taken," he said dejectedly.

"WHAT?! That's impossible! I locked-"

"Unless it was you who took it," the oldest Mukata-senpai said, approaching with menacing steps. The other two were behind him.

"I would never-!"

"Where's the evidence, like-"

"Let me finish!" I yelled. My heart pounded on my ears,the rapid tempo swallowing their shrills.

I heard Mukata-senpai flinch and step back, but I shunned it. Simultaneously, I felt a hand on my shoulder and silvery voice.

"No one is accusing you, Sumire."

I gasped and flicked my head to the voice, the afterimage of Higashi-san's figure flashing through my eyes. Staring into Gouenji's maroon eyes, I felt embarrassed about losing my cool so quickly, but most of all that his words soothed me.

This isn't how the doll of the Sumire Foundation should behave, the darkness said.

I moved away in haste, Gouenji-kun's hand slipping off. "I know. I know."

Looking at the rest of the team's faces, their anxiety and despair urged me to fix this. The Coach was speaking with the seniors, only the first years, Tobiyama-kun, Yakata-kun, and Mogi-kun noticed the ruckus.

"Everyone." I raised my voice, continuing after having their attention. "Captain managed to perfect the technique. I believe there isn't much to worry now." I smiled.

"But what if they use it to counter Fire Tornado? We don't have anything else!" Tobiyama-kun said.

"Then everyone has to support the captain." I clapped and looked at Coach Nikaidou. "Surely there is more than Fire Tornado in the soccer team's repertoire, right?"

The Coach agreed. "Yeah, the previous soccer teams designed other hissatsu." He scratched his head. "I was going inform you with the new training regime but plans changed. Starting today, some of you will be learning a hissatsu."

The team erupted with muttering and excitement, the previous glom dissipating like clearing fog.

"But." Another Mukata protested among the cheers. "If they took Fire Tornado, wouldn't they do the same with the other techniques?"

Everyone glanced at each other quietly. I narrowed my eyes.

"And. . ." his tone rose dangerously, "We don't know who took it, right, Sumire-san?"

I growled quietly. "What makes you think I took it?"

He grinned. "You were the last to leave. Is it like, obvious?"

I stepped forward. "If it's that obvious, anyone would have used a better method."

There was silence. The team members were looking and whispering at each other, unsure whom to believe.

"Fine." I flailed my arms, expressing my frustration. "If it helps everyone focus on the tournament. I want to know who took it as well."

I heard a "he" from the triplets and rolled my eyes.

"Sumire-"

Ignoring Gouenji's call, I lifted up my hand. "Coach," I began, a smile peeking my face. "Can I look around the school after setting up for practice?"

He nodded. "Thanks, Sumire-san. That's reassuring. Start afterschool, I want everyone present for the overview of the new training regime."

I hummed in acknowledgment, hiding the murderous intent towards the possible thief and my victory.

️ (^・ω・^ )

I knocked on the door to the student council. Having the coach's permission, I could move anywhere without receiving suspicious attention. There was more than one reason to prove my innocence to the team.

"Though in the end, I took advantage of their moment of weakness." I chuckled dryly. "Some dedicated manager I am."

A male's voice said to come in, and I pushed the door open. "Excuse me."

There were two people in the room, a brown-haired third year, Kensou Saburo-senpai, and the fool who had dug his own grave. The room was neat and organized, save from the papers over the coffee table between the two.

Kensou-senpai looked up from his laptop with a lazy smirk, "What can I help you with, Sumire-san?" he asked nonchalantly.

The first time I entered the student council, I easily recognized him and introduced myself. His older siblings and parents were successful in their respective fields and his looks were proportional to his popularity, though that didn't matter. It was his personality that put me on my toes. He was a cruel and selfish person who didn't think twice about using others. I had stayed at a distance so far, scared he might found out I was a spy.

"I would like to speak with Ryuugamine-senpai," I said without looking at him. The idiot was either ignoring me or hadn't acknowledged my existence as he kept working on his laptop.

"Ryuugamine, your girlfriend is pissed," he called amused.

"I-I'm not his girlfriend!" I protested, the tension slipping away from my shoulders.

"Hm?" Ryuugamine-senpai said and lifted his head, our eyes meeting again. "What the f-?!" He yelped, probably because I looked utterly pissed, holding his laptop as it was about to slip off his knees.

Looking at Ryuugamine-senpai with a grin, Kensou-senpai stood up. "I'll be back in a while." And walked out.

I glanced at him suspiciously. He was tougher than Senbayama's Invincible Wall. Trying to get information was foolish. I brushed my arm, calming the chills.

Another idea surfaced, but it was unlikely, so I shook it off. I trodded behind the sofa Kensou-senpai was sitting, speaking after checking his footsteps had faded far into the hallway. "I know it's part of the mission to give him the manual, but if I am found then you are going down with me."

Ryuugamine-senpai looked at me as if I was about to kill him. My eyes narrowed, savoring the idea. His every little action fueled my anger: his meek attitude, his foul language, his passivity. I felt like stinging him.

"Wha-what are you talking about?" he asked.

I placed my hands on the couch's backrest. "Fire Tornado's manual was stolen. The team suspects me, but I know it was you."

"It was stolen?!" he exclaimed, then his tone turned serious, "It wasn't me."

"No one in the school but us would want to take it. If it wasn't me, then it must be you. I asked Kidou-kun to confirm. The only ones working for that man is us."

Ryuugamine-senpai looked down, thoughtful. Eventually, he replied, "I-I don't know. Bu-but I didn't."

I felt my teeth clench. "Why should I believe you?"

"I'm just telling the truth." He scowled before looking away. "You don't have to believe me."

I let out a long sigh and shook my head, then gazed at him apologetically. "No, I do. Our goal is the same. It would be less than helpful if I didn't believe you."

He didn't respond. He seemed to be thinking about something.

"Anyway," I said, pulling back. "We have an issue in our hands."

He gave me a sideway glance. "That's none of my business."

I giggled mockingly, placing a finger under my chin. "Didn't I say it before? We fall together. I have no intention of letting you win this way."

It was as if I had struck a nerve. His expression hardened, eyes flaring with raw hatred. "You bitch," he said between his teeth.

I felt my eyebrow twitching. "Mou, that means we have to protect each other's back. I don't think you wouldn't expose me if you were found. So it is fair." I crossed my arms and shifted my weight to one leg.

He quickly deflated and deepened his grimace. ". . . You aren't wrong."

"I'll make sure you aren't found. I want to work together with you." I smiled, extending my hand. "Unity makes strength. Let's work together, Ryuugamine-senpai. That man didn't say we couldn't."

He stared at it with a conflicted expression, then shook his head sadly. "No. . ."

". . . I see." I retracted my hand slowly for an effect. "So that's how you want to do things."

"There's no way I can believe in you. It's nothing personal." He looked down meekly, his words heavy. He seemed exhausted and miserable. A drop of guilt fell onto the deep ocean in my heart.

I gazed at my hand. "Your rejection doesn't mean I won't cover you. That's one thing I want you to be clear."

He nodded.

I left the room, pondering about the other person I had to see as soon as possible. "Ryuugamine-senpai. . . -san . . . huh?" I hummed and chuckled. "There is no way they aren't related."

️ (^・ω・^ ) ️

I took the chance to return the violin to the music club. Bowing as I stood on the threshold, I noticed a blonde girl walking in the hallway.

"Ah, Ryuugamine-san!" I said cheerfully. "I was looking for you!"

She stopped abruptly with a hint of surprise. The tension from her body hadn't faded from the three times we have spoken, except when she requested for a challenge in the room I just left.

"I already said this. . ." I began, "but your words the other day helped me more than I can be expressed." I gave her one of my best smiles. "Thank you very much."

I bowed politely. When I lifted my head, I saw Ryuugamine-san's baffled expression. I giggled, thinking how cute it was.

"That's good. . ." she replied.

I held a chuckle from her nonsensical answer and waved my hand lightly. "It's alright. I don't expect you to understand and I can't explain it."

She gave another nod, now hesitant.

"And another thing. . ." I trailed off, linking my fingers. "I am sure you are tired of being asked this."

Her expression immediately turned stern, quietly waiting for what was to come.

Nevertheless, I pushed forward.

"Is it true? Is Ryuugamine-senpai-"

"I don't have a brother. I'm an only child," she answered without hesitation, glaring at me. Her eyes held a force similar to Ryuugamine-senpai's blazing orbs, but I wasn't the target of her hatred.

I stood there as she left, speechless, staring at the end of the empty hallway. For the first time, I wasn't sure what to believe.


	11. Circus Seal

Kiyoshi's body fell on the couch as the girl closed the door with a dull thud.

"You have to be kidding me. There can't be a third player," he said, the words barely slipping between his lips.

He hid his face with his hands. His first target was gone. He had already considered he was at a disadvantage because the girl could take it at any moment, but this was worse. Her being suspected had nothing to do with him, but the manual had to be found. This isn't how he thought things would be.

There was little chance he could find it while not raising suspicions; he should focus in Back Tornado's manual instead.

His muscles relaxed a little when he decided, but he could still feel the strain. He was clenching his fists too hard, his nails leaving marks on his palms.

"But where to start?" he asked himself in an effort to focus; the loss was distressing. He considered asking Kensou but was reluctant. That jerk hadn't done anything yet, but if he was capable of scaring him like when they met, then he didn't want to get involved in his plans or him.

Kiyoshi jumped at the sound of the rattling door, his thoughts coming to a halt.

Kensou entered with a self-satisfied grin, making Kiyoshi grimace in disgust and imagine the worst that could put this jerk in a good mood. "What did she want?" he asked pleasantly, making his way deeper into the office as if he already knew the answer.

He hesitated, staring at Kensou wordlessly. Everything the guy said that was outside his duties as the treasurer put him on his toes.

"What did she want?" He repeated, barely able to contain his excitement as his smirk stretched and leaned on the vice-president's desk.

Kiyoshi raised an eyebrow. "You. . . seem to know already. It's creepy."

 _You have to be kidding me._

Kensou chuckled and took out a notebook from the drawer then flung it to Kiyoshi, grasping it swiftly. "That has to be worth something. It was a lot of trouble convincing the teacher to stay quiet," he said as Kiyoshi scanned the contents.

"Seriously?" Kiyoshi chuckled dryly, the words having flown over his head. "It's crazy."

Manual gone. The girl is suspected. It falls on Kiyoshi's hands. He gives it to the Coach. First round, his win. Was something terrible going to happen? Heck, Kiyoshi wouldn't mind if it did.

"This is great." He grinned, shrieking as the notebook was snatched from his hands.

Kensou gave him a half-smile, the stolen manual tapping his shoulder.

"Gi-give it back!" Kiyoshi screamed as he stood up, glaring at Kensou.

"I never said I was going to give this for free." The manual changed Kensou's hands and he plopped his ass on the sofa.

Kiyoshi growled, but this jerk wasn't intimidated at all. "What do you want?"

"Your mission, what is it?" The guy rested his arms on the backrest, the manual hanging in his hand.

Kiyoshi puffed through his nose. "Give it to me and I'll tell you," he glowered. He wasn't good at negotiations, but he tried.

Kensou smiled smugly. "Don't even think of running with it to the door. I'm faster."

That was a good idea. But this jerk would make him spill the truth by force if he did that. Kiyoshi had a better one. He glanced at Kensou and pounced as fast as he could at the notebook when he seemed to be unguarded.

The notebook swiftly disappeared from his hand, flying towards the wall behind the couch.

Kiyoshi stepped on the furniture and propelled himself towards it before his vision flicked to the ceiling. Under the white light, it took him a moment to realize he was falling. The red oni roared, urging Kiyoshi to do something. But even if his brain realized the danger, his body was too slow to react but a short yelp. His back slammed against the floor, an arm burying deep against his stomach. Coughing as the air was sucked out of him, acid began rising to his mouth; Kiyoshi swallowed it down.

Kensou's face at the bottom of his sight had a victorious grin, and the back of the sofa loomed at his left. "You don't have brothers, do you?" he asked.

 _"As. . . if. . . I can answer!"_ Kiyoshi wanted to yell, his throat burning from the mixture of acid and air. The manual had fallen at his side, but he didn't have the energy to move.

Eventually, Kensou picked it and dusted it off.

"What's your mission?" he questioned again before looking back and smirking at Kiyoshi.

Sprawled on the floor, Kiyoshi lifted his head gave him the finger, a replacement of _"fuck you_." He didn't have to suplex him. The bastard. But the gesture only made Kensou more amused. "You can tell me after you can talk."

Kiyoshi groaned loudly in protest, promptly coughing violently. Later, he begrudgingly told Kensou about his mission, snatched the manual off his hand, and stormed out of the room after telling him to go to hell.

He was on his way to print copies of the manual before giving it back to the soccer club, part of one of his original ideas. It's absence had created too much trouble, and he didn't have to give the Coach the original. Kiyoshi grinned. Plus, it would be fun to see Kensou's face when he told him the manual was back in the team's hands. As puny as his struggles were, going against that jerk meant he was his own person, not a tool.

Rubbing his belly where Kensou's arm plunged, Kiyoshi stopped abruptly and took out his cellphone, pulling the screen with the messages between him and Keima. They had been exchanging pictures every so often as a way of supporting each other, but now Keima hardly had the strength to back him up. From Kiyoshi, he kept sending pictures, mostly calming nature pictures taken the past year. They helped him a lot. The latest one had two snow bunnies side on white fluffy snow, although the bigger one seemed to be crying.

It was earlier than usual, but Kiyoshi wasn't sure if he would have time later. He would tell Kidou-san he got the manual and might want to meet that same day. That would be nice.

He typed a message with a sad, worried expression.

 _"How was your day?"_

He had been asking Keima the same question every day since they went to the park and got real answers: he wasn't okay. Recently, Keima was having nightmares about Kin and was blaming himself for what happened. The more they texted, the more Kiyoshi remembered how much his friend had suffered.

Kiyoshi's lips trembled, tears at the corner of his eyes as he reminisced about Keima's self-depreciating texts. If Keima had to suffer because he was selfish, then Kiyoshi should be suffering more. He couldn't forgive he was covering his selfishness with kindness.

 _"It hurts but it's okay! I hate seeing you like this but I was the one who told you can depend on me. I'll accept that pain."_

It was a fact the red oni helped Kiyoshi stand the emotional strain. However, it was Keima's loving and grateful gaze after getting a hold of himself that filled it. The red oni was hungry for intimacy, and it made Kiyoshi warm; it was becoming his drug. He wanted to be showered in Keima's love. The little he could muster that the moment.

"Being by his side is the only thing I can do for him," he said, voice wavering. "Keima needs me." Kiyoshi cleaned his eyes, sobbing. "I'm sorry for being selfish. I have to feed it. . . I don't want to suffer."

If the red oni wanted love, then what did Kin-the blue oni according to Keima-wanted? The only thing Keima would tell him is that his death was his fault, and he didn't deserve to have a future.

Originally, the blue oni was the one who helped the red oni get along with the humans; Keima fits as the blue oni in that aspect. To Kiyoshi, Kin seemed more like the dead girl in Summer, Fireworks, And My Corpse: a corpse one step away from him than an actual oni. They had been compared countless times, but to Kiyoshi, he was a shadow. He couldn't touch it nor understand it. He was just there. If Kiyoshi could understand Kin, maybe he could help Keima.

"Ah, Senpai!"

Kiyoshi jolted at the sound of a female voice coming from the stairs and blinked rapidly. A girl with thick pink braids and purple hair waved as she climbed.

He backed away a few steps and looked around. The hallway was empty.

"I finally found you!" the girl said loudly as she reached the last step.

Kiyoshi looked away as he noticed a sweet smell mixed with sweat and slapped himself mentally. Another headache mildly throbbed.

"Let me interview you!" The girl quickly approached, closing in the distance between their bodies.

He backed away further in haste, the girl pressing on until being a breath away. It smelled like fried chicken with spicy sauce.

"No," Kiyoshi stammered with utter confusion. Questions raced in his mind, but the girl acted too quickly for him to collect himself.

"It will be an hour of your time!" She bounced forward and he stepped back, her excitement unshaken after a clear rejection.

Kiyoshi's eye twitched, and he twisted his face to meanest expression he could muster. "I don't want to," he stated quieter than he intended.

"Please! Your fans really want this interview!" she insisted with a smile.

There was something increasingly annoying about this girl. Maybe her funky appearance, her scratchy voice, or her persistent request. Or everything.

"That's none of my business." He took another step back and hit the wall. Kiyoshi grimaced. He had no interested in pleasing those stupid girls.

The girl suddenly retreated and swished her hand as if she was presenting something. "Mysterious transfer student! What could be hiding behind those impeccable grades and pretty face?" she announced confidently, her thick glasses glinting under the sun. "What do you think?"

"What the hell? I don't have time for this." He stepped aside and walked past the girl.

"Wait, Ryuugamine-senpai! You are the hot topic of the school! I have to write about you!" she cried.

Kiyoshi's body went cold as he felt a pair of arms wrap around his.

"Don't touch me!" He pushed the girl away and hugged his arm, trying to calm his trembling body. "I-I don't care about an interview or those girls! Get away from me! Don't touch me with your dirty hands you- disgusting woman!" Kiyoshi ran down the stairs, jumping every few steps.

Pressing his heels against the floor as a brake, he placed his hands against the wall he was about to crash onto. He ignored the students' yelp and tried to regain his breath, fixing his glasses.

"Ugh. Ew." Kiyoshi said shakily and rubbed his arm, trying to wear down the feeling. He will have to wash his jacket.

"That scared me. It's the transfer student."

"So cool~! Do you think he has a girlfriend?"

"Tch, I don't know. Ask him yourself."

"Eh~? No~. He's scary~."

Kiyoshi glanced at the students, grimaced, and entered his destination. The printer was close to the door, and there were only a couple of students around.

"Senpai!"

"Holy shit!" Kiyoshi's body shook to the core, and he took a fighting stance at the voice.

The girl stared at him confusedly, her pullover a little disheveled from the push. "Eh? Do want to fight?" She grinned widely. "I don't recommend it."

Kiyoshi looked down, noticing his stupid pose. Quickly retracting his arms, he placed the open notebook on the glass.

"Making copies of your class notes? I thought you didn't have any friends," the girl commented.

Kiyoshi grunted, hand falling to his side after hovering over the Print button. "It's none of your business."

The girl didn't move. Kiyoshi glared and the girl grinned back, her eyes flashing as if she understood something.

"Ah, it's _that_!" She took a step back, gesturing with her hand as she turned away. "Go ahead."

Kiyoshi's face went red. "Of-of course not! What the-the hell are you thinking?!"

Seriously, everyone in this school was idiots, and girls were the worst.

He pressed the button, moving his body between the girl and the printer's mouth.

"I haven't introduced myself!" she screamed, making Kiyoshi jump again. "Akasaka Megumi, first year, member of the Newspaper Club." She introduced herself with a loose military pose. She was so weird.

Kiyoshi looked away from her expectant gaze. "You already know who I am."

"Right." She laughed. "When can I interview you? The column goes out in a week so there isn't much time."

U￣ｰ￣U

Kiyoshi's patience was growing thin. He refused the interview enough times he considered beating her up to regain his daily peace. She had pestered him in the student council room, as he left the school, and came between breaks to his class the following day.

He brought her outside the classroom as she asked for him during the third time.

"I told you I don't give a damn about it!"

Even if this girl was a talent from the Newspaper Club, everyone hated her pestering attitude despite writing popular articles. She was like a circus seal, answering people's demands for mockery and fake praise.

"I have to write this interview no matter what! Everyone wants it!" she said with excitement.

Kiyoshi threw his fist to the wall, shutting up the girl and the whole hallway. She didn't flinch but looked a bit worried.

He hung his head low. After talking to Kensou about the Newspaper Club, he was debating whether he should use her. He had been mildly refusing her request until he set his mind.

Frustration seeping from his tone, he replied flatly. "I want to check the Newspaper Club's archive."

She was serious. She wanted to please her readers. Just like he wanted to please his classmates when he was little. And in the end, it was useless.

Her face broke into a victorious half-smile and raised her hand for a handshake. "The archives will be open for you."

Kiyoshi looked at her hand with dull eyes. "I'll tell you when I have time to spare for that thing." He walked back to the classroom, leaving the girl's hand in the air without looking back.


	12. A Look Into The Origins

I stared solemnly into the void's empty eyes, its darkness surrounding me. This time, I stood firm, for there was nothing to fear.

"I understand. I know why I was so afraid of you. I didn't want to accept the fact that I was empty; that, no matter what, I couldn't feel the same way as before." I stared at my hands, cold, pale palms that held nothing. "My past self was swallowed in this place, and there is no trace of it left. The dead can't come back to life."

I took a deep breath and giggled dryly. "Well, what can I do now but accept it? A doll will keep moving even without its master as long as it has their will. If I can't do anything to change the past, I just have to keep moving forward and save what can be salvaged from the ruins."

Static filled my senses, prickling my skin and stinging my ears. I kept smiling. "Mn, I can't compare to the real thing, the real Sumire Yuu, but I can only try. What else do I have to live for after all?"

The silent world dissolved from dirty black to pure white in a dying hiss. I clasped my fingers behind my back and placed a foot behind the other. "It doesn't matter if I am a lie. No one is keeping tabs, and pity is something she never received."

️ (^・ω・^ ) ️

"Yakata-kun, expand your field of vision. Kurobe-senpai is free!" I yelled, smiling as Yakata-kun passed the ball and decided to back down to support the defense when Gouenji passed through the opposing side of the field. "Good."

"They are improving day by day, these boys," Coach Nikaidou commented.

I agreed. "Learning hissatsus improved their morale. Now, they are more than willing to win." I stopped as Gouenji performed Fire Tornado, scoring the third goal. "If only the Mukata triplets accepted to work with the rest of the team, Goeunji-kun wouldn't have to bear the center of the attack formation alone."

Said trio was bickering at their teammates for allowing another point, not even a practice match easing their pride. I hummed. "If something were to happen to Gouenji-kun, we wouldn't have many chances, especially against Teikoku."

"I believe in Gouenji-kun. He is doing what he can as captain," the Coach replied with absolute confidence.

Turning back to the field, I erased all traces of emotion from my face. "If that is your wish. I will keep supporting Gouenji-kun. The burden of leading a whole group is not easy to bear."

After carrying out some chores, I continued to observe, giving encouragement and comments from time to time.

Eventually, the Coach mentioned Fire Tornado's manual. I flinched and giggled dryly. "Yes, it seems we panicked for nothing. Good thing it was merely displaced." I made an imperceptible sigh, placing my hand over my forehead. I had to work twice as hard to get the remaining manual.

"That reminds me," I started, hand falling to my side, "I was reviewing the documents in the clubroom for something that might help us, and I noticed the name of a certain hissatsu."

The Coach lowered his eyes to meet mine. I frowned for a swift moment before he replied. "Which hissatsu?"

"Tornado Legend. It is a name I have never heard about. Why aren't they learning it?" Holding my breath, I studied his features for a trace of a lie.

He sighed deeply and crossed his arms. After a few tense seconds, he stated: "they aren't prepared to learn it."

"Why is it? Because it's a triple hissatsu?" I glanced at the Mukata triplets. It will be wasted on them at the moment.

"That is one reason. Another is that it needs something three strikers don't have."

"What is that?" I asked swiftly, but his watch beeped, signaling the end of the mini-match.

The Coach whistled and walked to the team, giving them his complete focus.

I hissed and stomped my foot hard before going to the bench and retrieving the sports drinks.

"I need to know. I have to know."

️ (^・ω・^ ) ️

"Coach," I called out to him as morning practice ended, "I would like to hear more about the hissatsu."

"Ah, Sumire-san. . ." He looked away, discomfort apparent on his face. "You will be late for class, maybe before afternoon practice."

Sighing, I shook my head, "I will go during lunch break to ask anyway, so it's less of a trouble if you tell me about Tornado Legend now." I giggled at the change of his expression, covering a half-smile as the words seemed to test his patience.

"Isn't Tornado Legend that triple hissatsu the team created ten years ago?" Gouenji-kun interrupted, eyes lit with curiosity as he approached.

I bit my lip, but then perked up at the good fortune before I clapping once. "Yes, the Coach was telling about it during the match! It sounds interesting!"

Gouenji looked at Coach Nikaidou who was aware he was now outnumbered.

"All right, I'll tell you," he said, hanging his head in defeat.

️ (^・ω・^ ) ️

Ten years ago, two boys that will become legends stepped into Kidokawa Seishuu. Tatsumaki Ousho and Tatsumaki Noboru. They had the same dream as any other middle school soccer player, beat Teikoku and win the Football Frontier. But dreams can't be achieved with merely wishing, and that is what made the Tatsumaki twins different. They had talent. Enough of it. It started with a bet to create the strongest shoot.

The older created Fire Tornado, embodying the oldest's fiery spirit, and the younger devised Dark Tornado, the symbol of his destructive nature. By putting a piece of themselves in their hissatsus, they created a unique tune never seen in the soccer club. But this wasn't enough to beat Teikoku. A piece was missing. And it came the following year. A smaller piece called Tatsumaki Hideyoshi.

The boy was gentler, like the buffer that calmed his brothers' fiery souls. The twins made a truce, but the youngest sibling had also inherited that passion and talent for the sport. He created Back Tornado-proof of his passionate admiration and defiance towards his older brothers-before the Football Frontier, and soon, they decided to harmonize the three hissatsus.

"That is Tornado Legend," I said proudly. The team exploded in cheers and comments. It seemed most of them hadn't heard of the story, an odd action from the Coach. Gouenji and had I agreed to tell the team when the Coach wasn't around. We couldn't waste a golden opportunity.

"That is awesome! Why didn't the Coach tell us earlier?"

"Yeah, I knew the soccer team was super strong. But I didn't know it had been this strong!"

"I would have worked much harder if I knew we had this much history. We even made it to the nationals!"

I walked off the front row, mulling over the last statement. Glancing at Gouenji-kun, I commented a quiet "alright" to myself. "This should be enough to boost their self-confidence."

After we discussed the main topic of our secret meeting, it was decided Gouenji and I would look for Back Tornado and find what happened to Dark Tornado. I figured we could answer the latter if we asked Coach Nikaidou. I wasn't sure if Teikoku had the real manual or if Kidokawa had been smart enough to make a copy after all.

"You guys. . ." The Coach grumbled after Gouenji and I explained the reason for the team's excitement at his return.

"It's not like you told us to keep it a secret," I said, smiling playfully as he facepalmed.

"Even with the manuals, none of you would be able to learn Tornado Legend."

"But that can be our next objective after the tournament, regardless of the result," I challenged.

"Coach, please!" Gouenji-kun pleaded, the rest of the team immediately joining in chorus.

The Coach had proven to be weak under pressure, and it didn't take much for him spill Back Tornado's manual location. They did make a copy of Tatsumaki Noboru's hissatsu before the original manual was stolen, the last a detail the Coach kept to himself.

"Then I will go get it!" I said cheerfully, "Is it all right if I skip manager duties? I can find someone to take my place for the day." I had already begun to trot away backwards, humming loudly as I did an effort to wait for an answer.

"Wait." The Coach gestured at Gouenji. "Gouenji-kun, go with her."

My feet stopped moving, the tone dying. "Huh? Why? I don't need Gouenji-kun." I bit my tongue, regretting those words immediately. I had chosen my words wrong.

The Coach shook his head. "It's not because of that, Sumire-san," he assured.

"Then. . . why?" The team had fallen silent, and none of them met my gaze. The oldest Mukata's words seemed to have affected them more than I hoped.

"Fine. It doesn't mean I will slow down." I made my way to the closest building without waiting for Gouenji.

️ (^・ω・^ ) ️

"Sumire. . . Hey, Sumire. Hey! Tch."

Inside the cultural clubs building, our footsteps clicked quietly. I pressed forward without reacting to Gouenji-kun's call.

"Are you angry at me?" He inquired.

"We are wasting time." I doubled on the stairs towards the second floor.

"The Coach doesn't think you need supervision. It's because everyone else doesn't know what to think about you."

I stopped mid-step without turning back. "And why is that? Because they don't trust me. And the Coach cares more about the team's trust than supporting a student." As I was about to continue, my arm was held back. I yanked my wrist away, slipping through Gouenji's fingers with ease.

"Mukata-senpai's accusations divided the team, and the manual was in a place anyone could have left it," Gouenji mourned quietly, frustration seeping from his words but I stood unfazed.

"I understand that. We are talking about two different things." I resumed walking. "Anyway, I will do things my way whether or not you are around. I have been doing my job well all this time, and I certainly won't take a step back because of a boy."

I heard Gouenji-kun's steps cut short. "It's about that," he whispered.

I flicked around, crossing my arms with a condescending look. "Exactly, Captain."

He passed my hand through his head, chuckling dryly. Shaking his head, he said gently, but I detected a sneer, "Okay, I'll step back."

I nodded. "Thank you." We walked in silence for a few seconds, and I added a little apologetically, but determined, "I appreciate the help and company of course. I merely took the Coach's words as 'do her job.'" I gazed forward. "You don't need to say anything. I will take care of it."

Gouenji-kun replied a few seconds later. "I came because I want to know about Tornado Legend. Maybe the Coach felt guilty for giving you all the work off-field."

I tilted my head. "You are the ones on the main stage. This is the least I can do." Looking away, I quickly resumed the pace, a little slower now.

We eventually reached our destination. The student council office. I glanced at Gouenji, insecurity and doubt finally filling my now composed mind. Taking a deep breath, I knocked on the door.

Ryuugamine-senpai shouldn't be a problem.

️ (^・ω・^ ) ️

As soon as the bell rang, my phone rang furiously. As I was about to storm out of the classroom, I was held back again. I turned around in hurry. "Not now, Mitsumiya!"

"Sumire-san, wait. Are you really that busy? We haven't talked-"

I freed my arm and ran off, quickly taking out my phone. "Hello, yes, this is Sumire Yuu. Thank you for your call, Fuyo-san. . . Yes, Michio-san and Natsuki-san have been taking good care of me. . . Yes, about Kidokawa Seishuu's soccer team. . . Mn, I think it will be interesting to know how they have evolved from a novice team to its present one. . . This Saturday? Of course! Thank you very much!" I removed the phone from my ear and hovered over the End Call button.

"You sound much more cheerful, Sumire-chan. It is reassuring. I am sure the rest of the heads will be glad to have you back eventually."

I placed the phone over my ear and smiled. "Yes, that is my goal."

"Then, I will be glad to support you. The Sumire and the Fuyo Group go way back after all."

I nodded. "Mn, I have to visit soon as well. I hope Michio-san and Natsuko-san aren't too busy with college applications."

A few minutes later, I hung up. Making sure the staircase was empty, I slid down to the floor, stomach rumbling and body screaming for rest. I stared upwards.

"Huh?" I murmured quietly. "When was the last time I eat?" I blinked, trying to focus my hazy vision. I tried to push myself up with a lot of difficulties. "Well. . ." I grunted. "If everything is going as planned. . . then this to be expected. This is no one person's job," I said between huffs, gazing at my shaky arms. "She could have done it better."

I walked back to the classroom, taking a notebook and a protein bar after glancing at Higashi-san's lunch. I was determined on becoming a worthy successor of the Sumire Foundation and mend my mistakes. I had to relearn discipline and the meaning of hard work while keeping a facade at school and out. This pain was worth the effort. All pain was worth it.


	13. Snow Bunnies

**_Trigger warning: Panic attack._**

It was the usual Sunday.

Kiyoshi blinked twice, surprised his sight wasn't foggy despite recent events. It must be because he reduced his sweets intake and now exercised regularly, he thought with a clear mind. The new routine and habits were doing wonders. Kiyoshi felt he had more energy.

So this was not the usual weekend. Nevertheless, Kiyoshi hopped out of bed, took his cell phone from the desk, and checked his inbox.

"Nothing from Keima," he muttered, then started his day with a light jog before breakfast. He usually texted the day before to say he had time to work out together-more like train Kiyoshi. Maybe he had soccer practice.

After doing his appointed chores, he tied his sneakers and left the house. Mother had left a few hours ago after she was called from work, leaving Kiyoshi to finish cleaning the windows and silently agreeing he was in charge of dinner. The Coach somehow convinced her to accept the transfer, and Kiyoshi showed results as perfect scores in all his tests so far.

Everything was going well, home-wise. If only school was the same. In a quick trip to the student council room, the other day from his new spying spot as the team resumed practice, his movements froze when he saw the little girl with violet eyes gazed at him.

It was. . . awkward, especially because he acquired Fire Tornado's manual despite assuring he didn't have it.

Before she and Gouenji-kun left, Kensou notified them Kiyoshi would pass by soon during practice to get info about the soccer club's latest expenses.

"Sorry for the sudden news," he casually told the first-years who shook their heads and excused him. He also introduced Kiyoshi to the two, exchanging bows and names. Shuuya was a really cute name, he had to admit. However, his smile faded when he met the girl's stare as if saying he should fall off a cliff and die. Kiyoshi wondered if Gouenji-kun noticed her intense gaze.

After they left, Kensou told him if Back Tornado's manual was that important, then he had no intention of letting anyone take it.

Kiyoshi felt a drop of sweat trace down the middle of his back. If he found out about her, he was as good as dead.

"W-why won't you give it to me?" Kiyoshi grumbled in a small voice.

Kensou merely shrugged. "It would be too easy." He then narrowed his eyes. "And you have the terrible habit of sitting back and hoping everything falls in your hands. I was the one who gave you the tip about the empty third-year classrooms in the building in front of the pitch."

Kiyoshi instinctively pouted. "Why do you even care?"

Kensou's glare deepened to a murderous stare. "Because I hate people like you."

He stood silent, looking away from Kensou's eyes that finally showed real emotion.

Hatred. That's why he was torturing him. Kiyoshi was relieved and scared. Relieved because it was common, scared because of what he was capable of doing.

Unfortunately, Komoto-san, the student council president and the one the first years were looking for to request the manual, was so busy with the latest preparations for Alumni Day he hadn't been in the office at the same time as Kiyoshi for days. And getting his number was harder than he thought. Not that he would call, but text.

Kiyoshi took a short break from his jog, chugging down his water bottle as he leaned beside his favorite convenience store. Lowering his head as two girls passed by him, he heard them whisper about his looks, nudging at each other playfully.

He scurried into the store, lowering his gaze even further to hide his heating cheeks. His stomach was fluttery, like being tickled. He stared at his reflection and looked away. Okay, he _was_ good-looking. Not only he took care of his face, but with Keima's petting, he wanted to soften his blonde hair as well.

He glanced at his reflection once again, small, proud smile widening charmingly.

A familiar voice called his name. Kiyoshi turned around in a haste and greeted the old owner behind the register beside his grandson.

. . . He should buy something. Kiyoshi looked around frantically as the old man asked what he wanted, choosing a honey bun on a nearby shelf he decided to share with Keima.

"Thank you for your patronage." The clerk bowed as Kiyoshi left.

After strapping the small bag on his pants, he resumed trotting. He passed a few streets, the characteristic small, thick bushes that hallmarked his secret place soon came into view.

"I should have bought something for them instead," he said as he reduced speed and sighed. "Now I'm broke-Huh?" Kiyoshi blinked at the increasing sound of music while he neared the entrance.

He knelt behind the flower pots, peeking at the intruder.

Keima?! Kiyoshi narrowed his gaze. He seemed to be saying something. . . singing, it seemed. He was also clutching something in his hands, where the song seemed to be coming from. Most probably his phone.

"That. . . doesn't sound like Japanese," Kiyoshi muttered quietly with a deep frown. After a couple of minutes, he managed to catch two phrases in English.

 _Whenever I begin to feel the burning tears,_

 _Overflowing from my eyes._

As if the song was Keima's guide, sharp sobs escaped from his thin lips. Kiyoshi fell to his butt, the rest of the song flowing into his ears with ease. The melancholic notes of the guitar mourned a loss, the desperate lyrics trying to scream out the pain.

 _I wonder what the sparkles in your eyes,_

 _Are hiding from my mind._

 _Hiding from my open heart,_

 _And from your open heart._

Kiyoshi brought the edge of his palm to his wet eyes, a strange ache in his heart. Pain he didn't know its origin. He pushed himself off the ground and ran to Keima, throwing himself to his friend in pain.

"Ki-Kiyoshi?! Wha. . . what are you. . ." Keima's voice broke down before Kiyoshi felt droplets wet his shoulder.

He sniffed, the ache in his chest tightening sharply. The song still echoed between them, speaking about their suffering.

He tightened his embrace and spoke, "You are going to get through this, Kei."

There was a sharp inhale, the hands touching Kiyoshi's waist trembling. He burrowed his nose on the crook of Keima's neck. "If you were in pain, why didn't you call me?"

Keima replied a few seconds later, sarcasm dripping like water, "Kiyoshi, why do you think I'm here, in a place where I know no comes?"

Kiyoshi glanced down bashfully, then he noticed his femur was between Keima's legs. "So-sorry!" Embarrassment heated his brain, and he pulled away awkwardly. A hand flew to his head, scratching it thoughtfully. "U-um. . . Did you. . . wa-n-t to be. . . a-lone?"

Keima nodded with distant eyes, letting the answer settle into Kiyoshi's mind.

"Uh-uh, sorry! I-I-I am a bother, right?!" A hand squeezed his heart as Kiyoshi spoke, leaving charred marks at the self-depreciating words. "Bu-but-!" Kiyoshi stopped, staring at Keima's unchanging expression.

If you wanted to be alone, why did you come to a place where you knew I could find you?

Kiyoshi bit his lip, deciding to shut up.

A few moments later, Keima spoke softly as if it was too much of a trouble, "You came to see them, right?"

Kiyoshi looked up between the upper frame of his glasses and his bangs. "U-uhn."

"Don't let me stop you."

He nodded, standing up meekly to look for the calico cat and the black cat with white mittens. Looking back at Keima once, he focused on his task.

"Ah, there you are," Kiyoshi whispered as the black kitty brushed its head against his bent knee. He let his legs lay on the short grass for good, scratching behind the kitty's ear.

It purred, rolling on its body and showing off its white, fluffy belly.

Kiyoshi squealed, scratching the kitty's sign of trust. "You are so cute~."

After he was satisfied, he leaned back to check on Keima. No movement. The song had changed to a popular J-rock band's.

There was a soft but refined meow, pulling Kiyoshi back towards the calico cat that appeared from the dense trees behind the park.

Kiyoshi greeted her politely, letting her sniff his finger before brushing it against her cheek.

"You won't help him, will you?" he asked sadly. After an accident in which Hachi-chan scared the aloof calico, the cats resented the dog and his owner. "I can't force you but. . . I wish." He then added quietly, "I will do my best instead."

After a goodbye pet, Kiyoshi went back to the bench.

It was empty.

His eyes moved frantically, relaxing ever so slightly at Keima's leaving figure. Kiyoshi caught up after calling his name, Keima stopping in his tracks. He inhaled. He could do this. He could do this.

"Ke-Kei! Uh-um you-you know? I. . . I don't think you should be alone today. I know you want to but. . . " Selfish, Kiyoshi was so selfish. He brought a hand to his chest and inhaled. "Do you want to watch a movie in my house?"

Keima loved movies. It was the activity they did together the most when soccer and video games were out of the window.

His friend turned, staring at the ground, hands in his pockets. Eventually, he rubbed his neck. "Uh. . . I haven't checked what's out."

"It doesn't matter!" Kiyoshi squeaked, flailing his arms with mock enthusiasm. "We can watch something again. I'll make popcorn!"

Inside, he was shaking. A small chip on his white heart cracked and fell, revealing a bright red color. But Keima was worth it. He was his best friend. They made a promise.

Keima placed a hand on his head and stroke his hair. "Only because are desperate." He smiled casually. "Bribing me with food."

Kiyoshi looked down, cheeks flushed at his own actions. He used to do that back then. Back when he wanted to be with Keima. Food is one of animals' basic desires.

And pleasures.

U￣ｰ￣U

On the way to Kiyoshi's house, they talked. Keima tried to push the topic away from him to Kiyoshi's school life, but Kiyoshi insisted, and he wasn't pleased.

Squeezing his shoulders together, Keima grumbled like a kid who was wronged. "I was taken off practice. So I left early."

"Wha-what?! Why?!" Kiyoshi protested.

His friend frowned, jaw tightening. "Because I can't focus! Class, practice-I can't do anything!" He huffed, stopping for second and grumbled. "Sorry for raising my voice."

Kiyoshi shook his head immediately and smiled. "No, you are frustrated, right? It's fine."

"I'm a burden. To the team, to you." His voice lowered. "I can't be their knight."

Kiyoshi blinked. He was peeking into a new side of Keima. It was foreign, but he tagged along with hesitation.

Keima had a dream. Become the pillar that will bring his team to the nationals. As their ace striker; as the one whom they put their hopes on.

"Last year, we lost to Mikage in our second match," he mourned. "Four to zero."

Kiyoshi inhaled sharply. Teikoku was three times stronger than Mikage. In the span of a year, Tengawara had to be at least six times stronger to match Teikoku, let alone win. He gulped.

It was impossible. Why did this idiot take the hardest tasks? It was the first time he heard Keima had a clear goal-

Kiyoshi took Keima's hand in his own, holding it firm. "I will support you. To the end."

Keima's dim expression broke into a calm smile. "Thank you." Then, he chuckled playfully. "You have become bolder, Yoshii."

"What do you mean?" He asked, blushing as Keima squeezed his hand lightly. "Ah-" Kiyoshi tried to let go, but there was slight resistance from Keima's fingers.

"Ke-Kei," his voice squeaked.

His friend chuckled with a hint of malice, relaxing his grip so Kiyoshi's fingers fell out.

Kiyoshi looked away, his head on fire. Covering his red cheeks with the back of his hand, he couldn't find a place where his eyes could rest on. "That's mean."

"Sorry." His friend chuckled again. But it was forced.

U￣ｰ￣U

"How much butter do you want?" Kiyoshi asked, peeking from the kitchen door.

Keima made a sound, busy searching for a movie on the TV. "The usual, I guess." Adding after Kiyoshi placed a hundred grams of butter, sprinkled sea salt, and added olive oil to the pan, he asked, "Are you going to make sweet popcorn, too?"

"Erm, I don't think so. Pimples," Kiyoshi yelled.

He finished getting the snacks ready and plopped himself down on the couch.

"Sayuri-san's at work?" Keima asked as he popped some hot popcorn in his mouth, his expression immediately glistening like Hachi-dan's clean fur under the sun. "Your snacks are the best!"

"Ah, thank you. . ." Kiyoshi said bashfully with a small smile. "It's something really simple. . . Olive oil is healthier than vegetable oil. The way carbohydrates are aligned. . ." Kiyoshi glanced at Keima, his faraway expression making him stop.

"Keima?" he called. No response. Taking his hand and stroking it, his friend blinked and turned.

"Yeah? Oh, you were saying?"

Kiyoshi shook his head. "Let's watch the movie," he said sadly.

Keima's hand below Kiyoshi's flew to his neck. "Crap, I did it again, didn't I? I'm so sorry."

Kiyoshi smiled tightly. "You don't have to apologize for things you don't have control of, Kei."

His friend frowned. "No, I should. I should be able to control it. I know I'm a liability right now. Even Itsuki is worried, more after I had told him."

Kiyoshi's mouth closed, and he looked away from Keima's direction. Itsuki, Keima's friend, one of their past teammates. A dirty bubble was rising from his gut. Keima's secret wasn't only theirs anymore.

"It's good someone else can help you at Tengawara," Kiyoshi said flatly.

"I. . . I guess. At least, it's a bit easier than last year."

Kiyoshi bit his lip. Keima and Itsuki became inseparable when they started middle school. But he didn't think Keima was capable of trusting someone else with this delicate topic during his absence.

It was his fault. He shouldn't blame Keima for this ugly feeling. But _why the hell, why the hell did he need him if he had someone?_

The movie started, the red oni's roar never stopping.

U￣ｰ￣U

Kiyoshi took the empty popcorn bowl when Keima spoke, "Hey, Kiyoshi?"

"Mn?" He stared down at the bowl, not bothering to look him in the eye.

"It's an insensitive question."

Kiyoshi scoffed. "Since when did you care about being sensible?" Adding, "I don't mind."

Keima rested his hand on his chin, fingers lazily touching his lips. He stared at Kiyoshi from the corner of his eyes for a moment. "Did you feel like this. . . when your sister left?"

"What are you. . . -!" Kiyoshi's memories received a blunt blow as if a bat was swung down his head full force. It awakened the memory of a cold blue eye gazing at him, disappearing a few moments later.

Kiyoshi gripped his head, the red oni flailing hysterically as its piercing roar cut his connection to reality. He witnessed the chains tighten around its limbs, torso, and neck, ripping its skin, but only causing its frenzy to increase.

The origin of the pain. The cause of the pain. The person he loved the most who left him, leaving him broken beyond repair. It was only time before Kiyoshi decided to cope by unconsciously creating a monster.

A faint squeeze brought him slightly back to reality.

"Mi. . . Miyu-chan. . ." Kiyoshi whispered her name between sharp breaths, tears strolling down the corners of his eyes.

"Kiyoshi, calm down! Don't think about it! I shouldn't have asked! Focus on my voice!" Keima didn't understand. He couldn't put it away now. He was more self-conscious than when he was a child. Him going crazy was also a matter of time.

"Damn it, Kiyoshi!" Keima took his face in his hands. "Kiyoshi, can you hear me?" The words sounded muffled. Kiyoshi tried to focus, hearing sharp breaths in a frenzy rhythm. He wanted Keima to stop him, but his mouth didn't move an inch.

Keima cursed again, hesitation and fear flooding his eyes. He took Kiyoshi's glasses off, asking him to close his eyes before leaning his forehead against his. "Kiyoshi, focus in my voice. It will be fine. Match my breathing," he said sternly.

Kiyoshi focused on Keima for a while, trying to obey his orders. His hands were warm against his cold skin, reminding him he wasn't alone despite fear and panic knawing his thoughts.

During that period, time seemed to stop. As Kiyoshi's breathing slowed, he held onto the sight of his friend even tighter.

After affirming he was calm, Keima carefully laid Kiyoshi on the couch and caressed his hair in a soothing manner. "Your breathing is back to normal. I'm glad it helped."

Kiyoshi's body was mostly immobile, strengthless, but he smiled as a sign of silent gratitude. It was the first time Keima had managed to stop it efficiently. He wondered if he had researched about it.

Keima was so caring and cool, keeping calm in a stressing situation. Kiyoshi blushed at the thought. His body was now warm and tired. The red oni was calm as well, filled with the emotions that flooded him.

As his consciousness faded, the song Keima was crying out hours before wafted into his ears once again, gaining a new meaning. It was how he felt about his sister, yearning for her presence, wondering if they will ever meet again, yet, wanting to forget the pain.

 _Whenever I begin to feel the burning tears,_

 _As I look up at the sky._

 _I keep on looking forward at it hoping that_

 _I'll find you soon enough in time._

 _I wonder if the stars that sparkle in my eyes_

 _Will eventually subside._

 _Hiding from my endless heartbeat,_

 _From my endless heartbeat._

 _Together you and I will always be alive,_

 _Committed close to you I'll stay._

 _As long as I can hold your hand,_

 _Again and again,_

 _Then maybe I will find the way._

 _I can never travel back in time_

 _But they smile back at me those days_

 _And everything remains the same._

 _This pain I will soon awake from_

 _What I see will melt all away,_

 _With my tears._

Miyu-chan left him because he was weak. Because he was too scared to go against their mother. It had been six years, and his love for his dear sister hadn't faltered a second. It was so strong, the red oni cried.

That meant Keima and him were truly like snow bunnies, lonely creatures that look pleasing to the eyes. They melt during summer, leaving no trace of their previous existence behind.


	14. From Friend to Foe

**Chapter 17** **| From Friend To Foe**

"Sumire-san~" Chiyo-chan sang as the bell rang, waving from her seat near the door with a bright smile. "Let's eat together~"

I sang back and took my bento, careful to not bump on the hazy desks. Dread settled on my stomach as Chiyo-chan's figure grew larger, her towering figure causing my blurry vision to play tricks on my mind. I plastered a smile as a greeting, my stomach growling quietly.

"Where's Mitsumiya?" I questioned, straightening my skirt before sitting.

"She'll be back soon," Chiyo-chan answered. Her cheerful expression darkened for a moment but before I asked, she changed the subject. "Anyway, what have you been doing, Sumire-san?" The urge to push the chair back to ease the icky feeling that was eating away my hunger tightened like a curse. I shooed away the thought, sharpening my vision and hearing. My muscles hardened at her next words. "It's been a while since we ate lunch together."

"You are right." I faked a pleasant smile. "I have been busy but I'll try being around you two more." My eyes drifted away towards an empty seat. ". . . I am always grateful for you and Mitsumiya pulling me back."

"Back?" Chiyo-chan asked with an innocent blink. "Back from where?"

I gave her another smile. "Don't mind that. I was rambling." Staring directly at her face blurred the rest of her body, easing the pain in my stomach. I kept it up.

I told her I was attending club business. Despite managers typically having simple jobs, at Gakushuin Elementary, overcoming set expectations and roles was our motto.

"So you know a lot about health stuff?" Chiyo-chan marveled.

"Yup! Nutrition, first aid, encouragement, and psychology related things." I ate a piece of a seasonal fruit. Hm, peach. I brought my gaze back at her face as my body quivered in irrational fear.

"That's amazing," she exclaimed, slumping on her seat as our legs bumped together under the table.

I muffled a scream, the peach almost falling through the wrong pipe.

"The judo club could really use someone like you," she commented.

"Is everyone as tall as you?" I squeaked as soon as I swallowed.

I apologized when her eyes widened, indignation clear on her face. Nevertheless, her concern reply was: "Sumire-san, are you all right?"

"Y-Yes!" I waved a hand. That moment of carelessness took away the strength on my hands, the chopsticks between my fingers falling with dull clicks. My breathing became more erratic, and I sunk my body to pick the fallen chopsticks up. When my fingers brushed against them, the speakers came to life, calling my name.

"The student council office?" Chiyo-chan questioned, bending her had to the side.

"Yes." I slammed the chopsticks on the table, avoiding Chiyo-san's curious gaze. "I want to talk to them about the soccer club. If we win the next two matches, we will be in the nationals after all." I repacked my bento with fumbling fingers.

"Talk to you later!" I turned away but Chiyo-chan called me back.

"Hm?" I yanked my head back with a forced smile. "What is it?"

Chiyo-chan straightened herself, gazing with a complex, stern expression, a flash of a grown man holding a gun in front of my face flickered like an old TV. I muffled a mad scream with sheer will.

After the moment stretched far too long, she dismissed the topic with a wistful "nevermind".

I scurried away, dollops of sweat condensing on my forehead. _Sorry, Chiyo-chan._ I bit my lip and left the classroom after placing the half-eaten bento in my backpack. _It's nothing personal._ It was the bad dreams. The nightmares.

I had to do something to make up from my continuous absence to them. The thought of losing the only thread that tied me to the class snapping in two sent a chilly breeze across my bones.

️(^・ω・^ )

At last, I reached the room. Catching my dissonant breath before knocking on the door, I announced my presence and stepped in. As I delved deeper, my footsteps faded like a dying tune.

Kensou-senpai grinned as he sat on the president's chair, the Queen of Hearts and Queen of Black Hearts stuck between his fingers; a chess pawn and a king standing right beside said hand. My eyes surveyed the scene until falling on Ryuugamine-senpai's guilty expression, and I immediately understood the situation.

But before I could say anything, a person exhaled behind me. I turned on my heel in a haste.

"Mitsu. . . miya. . ." I uttered.

"Hello, Sumire-san," she greeted with a playful smile, closing the door with a dreadful click and reclining against it. "I'm surprised you are involved in something so fun."

I swallowed hard. "Where is Kumoto-san?" I asked Kensou-senpai, turning away. I requested one of the members of the student council to call me if the president was in the room to see Back Tornado's manual.

"I think it's pretty obvious what is going on here, Sumire-san," he said, flicking the cards between his fingers. "If it wasn't for Kiyoshi here, I would never know Kageyama had already sent a spy. He wouldn't have made such an obvious mistake."

I bit my lip and glared at the blonde boy who evaded my gaze. "I don't know what you are talking about," I declared.

He snorted. "All right, if that's how you want to play. This is a better fight than what Kiyoshi is putting up. I like it."

The mentioned boy pressed his lips in a thin line, regret written all over his face. Had I realized he was my greatest weak point, I would have kept him close.

️(^・ω・^ ) ️

When I left the room, the bell that had long signaled the end of lunch passed.

My body groaned from pain and exhaustion, my throat burning along a light headache. I rested under the window, clutched my knees, and buried my head.

Expectations, expectations. I disappointed everyone by not answering them. I couldn't get over the grief over my parent's loss to be the pillar of trust they needed in that moment of panic.

"Kensou-senpai is right. I am as useless as Ryuugamine-senpai," I mourned.

Who else would protect the promises they made and carry their will? Protect those will less like Tsukichi-san's and Higashi's family?

I dug my hand in my pocket and took out of my father's most prized possessions. A gleaming violet stud earring that would be mine when inherited their place.

I was as weak spirited as my father, not like my mother who took a gun with her inexperienced hands to protect me.

"Sumire-san," Mitsumiya murmured.

I hugged myself tighter as if it would remove from reality. I wanted to drown in the darkness that didn't consume me, neither that day nor the years later. My vision was pitch black, and for the first time, I admitted I found some relief in it.

"The moment I closed the door, I accepted there was no going back. But I didn't think it would be that bad. That you would. . ."

I burrowed my head deeper, the inside of my arms covering my ears yet Mitsumiya's voice echoed. I clenched my jaw and sniffed, cursing the sharpness of human ears under my breath.

"I thought we were friends after I invited you to the restaurant. But then you started evading us because of who knows what. It's not like it's the first time it has happened, Chiyo and I had a terrible reputation in elementary school. . ."

Silence.

"We really believed your act."

". . .Odayaka-san," I started, my mouth moving on its own, "Does she know?"

She seemed to hesitate. "I didn't tell her the details. Odayaka?"

"I have never called a friend by their first name."

"So you were forcing yourself." Mitsumiya huffed. "This is better. Although she wants to believe you are a cute little girl."

"That's a shallow way to live," I commented.

"She isn't very smart, but she is a good person."

I made a sound of agreement.

Time passed, my body loosening from the heavy experience. I had half a mind to call Higashi and go home, my consciousness slipping away when Mitsumiya opened her mouth again.

"Hey, Sumire-san? Are you doing this whole Tornado technique alone?"

Another sound of agreement.

"Then, is it possible I can help you? Kensou-senpai is helping Ryuugamine-senpai after all."

"What?!" I popped my head out, hissing as my eyes came in contact with the light.

"Yeah, I thought you knew," she deadpanned, her figure hazier than before.

"Of course not." I frowned, rubbing my eyelids at the painful throb around my eyes.

"What about what I asked?"

I didn't even take a moment to consider a reply, "I know this sounds rude, but why do you think I want to be around you?"

I was going to reassess my relationship when I went back home after a nap.

"Thought so. . ."

"Why did you do that in the first place?" I questioned as I moved to massage my temples in small circles, "something about me ignoring you?"

Mitsumiya nodded, the thick braids at her sides swaying in unison.

"I take the blame for that and was planning to make it up to you soon." I gave her a look. "Now, I'm not sure."

Her face fell, lips twisting in a slight grimace. "I took it too far. I wanted to apologize with actions."

I considered her words for a moment. "I am a workaholic. I choose work over everything else," I admitted.

She looked at me over the corner of her eye. "That doesn't sound like the person Kensou-senpai described."

". . . Work was all I had."

"Friends?"

I frowned. "Did the girl he described sounded like she cared for them?"

"But you had them," she remarked.

I stared at the wall in front of me. "I didn't see them as such, and after my parents died, I realized they never were."

However, flashes of the sleepovers with Tsukichi-san ran through my mind: the moments she revealed her parents' fights, or that she was scared of not fitting in unless I had pulled her.

"To be honest, that might as well be another girl," I continued. "Those memories seem so distant now." I stared down at my loafers. What I remember the clearest was trying to read the atmosphere in the class and doing nothing to disrupt it. The occasional brave moment to change my situation was halted with a comment of "read the mood" from one of the boys if I tried joining any conversation.

"Rumors are a nasty thing," I said.

"You are right," Mitsumiya replied.

"I became the manager of the soccer club because someone recommended it. The students were from other classes, unlike the music club."

"So you _were_ in the music club," she asserted.

"I loved it," I said, placid. "I loved the soccer club as well. There were so many different people with different needs. Lending them a helping hand was. . . Nevermind."

I raised my head to the ceiling. Even though I had also failed to uphold the image Mitsumiya had of me, this conversation made my body light and comfortable as if I was talking with Yuuto. This was how talking to a friend was.

️(^・ω・^ ) ️

I skipped the rest of the lectures for the day, passing by the faculty office to let the coach know of my absence. Excusing myself for anemia, I was able to take a long nap after Higashi-san won the debate of who will eat the rest of the bento. _Me._

I decided to take a stroll in the neighboring city with her after an early dinner, the place holding so many precious memories: the rare moments I enjoyed a full day with my parents and the spontaneous outings with Higashi for a casual stroll around the lively shopping district. The latter was my whim that day.

The lights of the stores flickered on one by one as the sun retreated, a blue curtain closing in from the other side. Our steps reverberated in the stone blocks, the conversation lively.

"I'm not one to ask for friendship advice, but it doesn't seem she holds ill wishes against you now," my greatest confidante concluded after I had finished recounting today's events.

I hummed. "You have a point." I frowned. "But I am still angry."

"Would you forgive Kidou-sama if he had done the same thing?" she teased in an attempt to have me back down.

"Of course not!" I shot back, crossing my arms. "I would tell him to not talk to me for a week!"

Higashi-san giggled. "That's not a long time."

"Enough for him to think over his actions, _hmph_."

"More importantly, it is you who needs to be punished, _ojou-sama_."

I turned my head to her, eyes wide at those inappropriate words. She stared with a miffed expression, hurt dark red eyes like blooming carnations. I got a loud reprimand over my actions this past couple of weeks, compromising my health over my job. She was right, health was more important.

I enveloped her in a hug as tears began to fall from her rosy cheeks, a healthy hue from the exposure to the sun, and profusely apologized. I bit down my bottom lip to stop the tears from resurfacing and promised her I wouldn't do something that reckless again.

I pulled her to a nearby table and took out my handkerchief, cleaning her flowing tears from where her hands couldn't hold as she sobbed. I didn't mind the subtle glances and the whispers. I told myself they weren't directed at me.

"Higashi-san. . ." I whispered.

"I'm sorry. . . _hic_ . . . I. . ."

"No, I'm the one who should apologize," I interrupted in a haste. "I know you care a lot about me, not because it is your job but genuine concern. I was selfish. I apologize. . . Although that isn't enough."

"Why you are the one who has to cheer me up? I should be the one giving you advice," her voice quivered.

I giggled lightly. "I don't know."

"Sometimes, it's as if I can't do anything for you," she confessed.

I waved my hands frantically. "That's not true! I would die of starvation if you didn't cook for me. And washed my clothes. And cleaned my room." I shrunk a little over admitting I wasn't independent as I preferred to believe.

Higashi didn't respond. I took it as a good sign and traced my hand down her long orange hair.

"You are pretty."

Higashi-san giggled before sniffing. "I'll fall for you, Sumire-sama."

I laughed. "Let me get you something to drink. Wait here." I walked away without waiting for a reply, giving her a necessary moment alone. I searched for a vending machine, now full-fledged accustomed to it after first using it when I bumped into Ryuugamine-san.

"All the girls following me," I quoted Kensou-senpai about my former self and chuckled. "That sounds odd." That strange tickling that came at awkward times brushed my stomach, and I shook my head. "I already confirmed I can't fall in love, so there's no point in pondering."

As I was about to make my way back, I bumped into someone. "Ouch." I looked up. "Ah, I apologize."

With hair as black mine and parted bangs away from her face, light blue eyes filled with scorn set on me, sharpening as they recognize my figure.

The tea bottle in my hand fell. "Tsukichi-san," I breathed. 'What are the chances?' I wasn't able to add.

"Sumire-san," she glowered. "What a coincidence."

"Yes!" I beamed, jumping a little. "I'm glad to see you."

"Is that so?" She asked unconvinced, her eyes hardening ever so slightly.

"Of course!" I smiled sweetly. "I know after-"

"You really have the nerve to say that."

My smile fell, and I couldn't pull it back up. "I know I don't have the right to. But I am getting my back on my feet. Maybe one day-"

"It's too late," she interrupted. "I prefer the school and the place where I am now. My family is happier. More than ever."

All the excitement I held ebbed out of my body, my voice flattening like a pancake. "Oh. I see." I bit my lip. There was something she was hiding and wanted me to bring out.

"So," I began nonchalantly, "is everything okay?" I tugged the corners of my lips. She had grown so much. Perhaps as tall as Mitsumiya.

"I have friends."

There wasn't a hint of that innocence I liked so much about her on the surface. Instead, she hid in the depths of her eyes, waiting for someone to take her out.

"Tsukichi-san." I placed a hand on hers. "I know something is going on. Tell me."

Her eyes widen at the contact, snatching away her hand and turning around. Her shoulders shook violently as if a dam broke.

"Tsukichi-san," I gasped.

"A boy. . . confessed to me," she seethed.

"Eh?" It took a moment to think of an answer. "Congratulations."

"I rejected him."

My eyes widened for a moment. "I. . . see. That is tough."

"I couldn't see myself falling for him."

"Tsukichi-san." I frowned. "I don't know where you are going with this. I'm not good with this topic."

"I. . . I like. . ." Her voice became smaller, grieving. "Girls."

I instinctively took a step back, awkwardness setting on the bottom of my stomach. I brought a hand to my mouth.

I was fine with love being something I could never experience. But. . . But. . .

"It's your fault," she accused, her back still facing me.

My heart leaped. "What?!"

"You wanted to prove you had kissed someone, right?! You were curious."

I frowned, clenching my hands into fists. "I was curious, yes. But don't say it as if I forced you."

"How could I ever say no to you?!" she screeched. "Your parents supported my family! My parents told me every day to not be a burden to you and do everything you wanted!"

Bitterness towards the submissiveness of Tsukichi-san's family flooded my mouth. "That is the worst. I didn't know. Adults can be very cruel."

She didn't reply so I continued, my voice firm like a mountain. "When I asked you, I wanted to make sure you were comfortable. I trusted your answer."

"Give me back my first kiss," she spoke between her teeth. "Give me back my normality."

I lowered my head, frowning at the ground. "I can't give back the first one, but I wasn't the one who took the latter."

"You are lying."

"I am not."

"Then I'm really. . ."

I was just as uncomfortable and hesitant to finish that sentence.

"And I will never be able to understand love," I added to comfort her.

After we had parted, I went back to pick the tea bottle from the floor. As I crouched down, the futility of my objective finally dawned. My best friend didn't need me anymore. Perhaps it was the same for many others.

Sad violet eyes stared back from the diminute reflection on the plastic. I placed my other hand over my burning cheek, half accepting I deserved it for so many reasons and wanted more, the other half denying responsibility for the careless words of an adult.

Her parting words echoed in my head and I sunk into the dark forest once again.

 _"I hate you."_

 **From Friend To Foe | End**


End file.
